Is shopping better than sex for Victoria Beckham?

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When Marc Jacobs announced that Victoria ‘Posh’ Beckham would be his next ‘it’ girl, folks were shocked. Jacobs -- known for his penchant for girls as shy and gangly as newborn foals -- has broken his own mold by using a virtual blow-up doll of a dame as the face of his new ad campaign, shot by Juergen Teller.

Here’s a peek at the first image -- with Beckham’s legs askew.

Icky, right? Even offensive. It would seem that Victoria Beckham is either dead inside of a Marc Jacobs bag or that she is being born from a shopping bag. Now that I think of it, a shopping bag would probably best represent the womb for her.

WAIT! Now, I get the subtext of this racy ad. In showing Beckham with her legs spread in post-coital slump, Marc Jacobs is clearly telling us that shopping is better than sex. And frankly, I might agree. The mere glimpse of a shoe sale rack makes my knees buckle with anticipation. (Looking for my actual size could be considered foreplay.) When a pair of pants fit me well, I practically orgasm with relief.

And if I hate myself in the morning, I just go back and return everything.