The Heidi Chronicles, part 11: Finally, a trainer

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This is Heidi. Earlier this year, she was ‘discovered’ in the park by a pet talent agency; since then, she has embarked on a one-dog quest to break into the business. This is her Hollywood story as chronicled by Times staff writer Diane Haithman. And this is her “head shot”: That longing look was the result of seeing a biscuit just out of reach.

Who would have thought that an animal actor would have to get a stamp of approval from the USDA, like a slab of supermarket steak?

In Chapter 10, Heidi and I met with Sue DiSesso, hearing from the seasoned Hollywood animal trainer that Heidi would have to learn to speak — that is, bark — on cue before she could even think about a career in TV and film.

And as the conversation continued, Sue threw us two more unexpected career requirements: The first was that, if Heidi manages to become a working actor, a union will have to be involved. Oh, no, I thought — there was a dog actors’ union?

Called WAG, perhaps, or ARFTRA? Would Heidi end up wagging her tail on some Hollywood picket line when her contract expired? No, Sue said, it is the trainer, not the dog, who has to be in the animal trainers union, part of Local 399.

But it is the working dog, not the trainer, who must be registered with United States Department of Agriculture. The government regulates working animals, sending inspectors to check health records and to make sure the animal is given proper care. “The book of rules and regulations is an inch or more thick,” Sue said. At present, birds, rats and horses are exempt, but Sue said they will soon be USDA regulated too.

“She can work one job without being USDA, but if she gets steady work, she must be registered,” added Sue. And what about that first job? This was my cue to see if I could talk Sue into training Heidi. I could feel a “no” forming on her lips.

Sue was only just beginning to pull her life back together after the death of her husband and professional partner, Moe DiSesso. Besides, she added, any one of the oddball little dogs who tend to frequent Studio City’s Aroma Cafe (see photo) had a better chance of being cast than big, beautiful Heidi because they can provide a unique look — leading me to wonder if it is true that there are no small roles, only roles for small dogs, or however that old showbiz adage goes.

I’m not sure who looked more pleading, me or the dog, but by the last sip of our mocha lattes, Sue had reluctantly agreed to take on Heidi as a client. “We’ll see if we can get her some work,” she said, adding these warning words: “But it takes about a year to studio-train a dog.”