PREACH IT! The no-holds-barred ‘Jersey Shore’ appearance onslaught may see a few bars held

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Hey! Lookit! Snooki has a boyfriend! And ain’t he just the classiest juicehead what ever ate a plate of ziti. You there! Snooki’s boyfriend! Over here! Just want to ask you a few ... ... hey, where are you going?

Snookers, Snickers, Snackers -- to Pauly D, Snooki’s name seems to change every day -- has apparently found love (no need for that spinoff reality show anymore, hm?), but that may be the last decent news morsel we get about the ‘Jersey Shore’ kids for quite a while.

According to the gossips, MTV has begun to clamp down on the public appearance schedules of its seven guidos and guidettes.

Celebuzz quotes a source close to the show thusly:

‘We have to put in controls to protect the brand. We don’t want them out all over the map at every single bar in the country.

‘They have to get permission from MTV prior to doing a personal appearance -- we don’t want one of these kids appearing in a topless bar. Pauly D’s fan base is about 85 percent women between 12 and 21, we have to protect that.’

If the crackdown is real, it’s far from abnormal; back when Jon Gosselin was engaged in an all-out scrum with TLC, we learned that Gosselin’s ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8’ contract essentially gave the network approval over interviews or public appearances. And when Gosselin started violating that contract, TLC sued. And won an injunction.

So how will the kids get their dance-floor battle on if they’re muzzled like that? They’ll have to manage somehow; MTV has mandated that the cast limit public outings to two a week. Otherwise, the cast members face Gosselin-style lawsuits or fines.

-- Leslie Gornstein

The Ministry of Gossip would like to send you down the shore:

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PREACH IT! Step away from the cameras, Snooki -- we’ll find a guy for you

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