‘Life Unexpected’: So many boys, so little time

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Well, I’ve ruled out morning radio jockey as a possible career change after seeing that Cate (Shiri Appleby) and Ryan (Kerr Smith) have to wake up at 4:45 a.m. There’s not even morning sex in it for Ryan because Cate won’t have morning sex until she gets rid of her morning breath. Too bad her bathroom’s been invaded by Baze (Kristoffer Polaha), who is suddenly everywhere in Cate’s life. He’s been sleeping over after hanging out with Lux – awww – and falling asleep on Cate’s couch. He’s even helped himself to Cate’s kitchen. Ryan is none too happy and requests “less Baze in our lives.”

Bad influence Jamie (Reggie Austin) – come back, Math (Austin Basis)! -- thinks Baze just needs some meaningless sex, unless he’s hung up on Cate. Baze insists he isn’t and attempts to hit on a woman at a coffee shop with the old “Do you come here often?” line. It just doesn’t sound right outside a bar. He justifiably gets the brushoff from the woman, who just so happens to be Trina (Gina Holden), Cate’s and Ryan’s corporate bossinatrax. I’d be willing to bet money her role model is Meryl Streep in “The Devil Wears Prada.”

Trina is in town because while everybody still loves Ryan – why wouldn’t they? -- the listeners’ love for Cate has dwindled faster than viewers’ love for “Heroes.” The listeners are confused by Cate’s man drama. Ryan’s not the father? Who’s Baze? She’s engaged to who? I’m not surprised. Cate seems just as confused herself. The station should just put a cheat sheet up on its website. But I’m not the boss. Trina is, and her idea is to have Baze join Ryan and Cate on the air to clear things up. Yes, because having two guys on the air at the same time whose voices listeners might not be able to tell apart is going to help things. But what do I know? The listeners go gaga for Baze’s and Cate’s chemistry, which consists of two parts bickering and one part ridicule. One listener asks if anything has ever happened between the two since high school. Baze and Cate pause before answering no. That – and Cate’s constant talk about Baze – is enough to raise Ryan’s suspicions. Cate tells Ryan nothing has ever happened and then goes over to Baze’s place to tell him Ryan wants “less Baze.” When she arrives, she finds Baze and Trina in a state of nearly there undress. Baze runs after Cate, who says he just raped her eyes. Somehow, the argument evolves into Baze yelling at Cate to man up and tell Ryan the truth if she feels so guilty about lying to him. Cate tells him she’d like “less Baze” too. I should note that Baze never puts on a shirt for this entire argument.

Meanwhile, Lux (Brittany Robertson) is dealing with some boy troubles of her own. She’s managed to convince Bug (Rafi Gavron) to give up his bike so that Jones (Austin Butler) will drop the charges against him and save Bug from having to go to jail. At first, I found it bratty of Jones that he wanted to take Bug’s bike. I bet his family has five cars, any of which he could “borrow.” Plus, he can’t even start the bike. Lux has to do it and then tells him to get on the back. She can ride! This moment made me so proud of Lux. She takes Jones to Bug’s childhood home and tells him a sob story about how Bug’s mom mentally checked out and let his dad wail on him. Jones agrees to give the bike back.

“Really? You’d do that for Bug?” she asks incredulously. You just told him an incredibly sad story, Lux. What did you think was going to happen? Probably not the kiss that Jones foolishly tries to plant on you afterward. At least Lux is smart enough to push him away, but it’s not enough to save her when she and Jones ride up to Cate’s, where Bug is waiting. Naturally, Bug gets jealous and tells Jones to back off his girl before calling Lux “damaged goods” and implying that no one else would love her. This is exactly the kind of behavior that rubbed me the wrong way last week when Bug basically said Lux would never be good enough for the popular kids or college.

Lux takes Cate’s advice and decides to tell Bug the truth about what happened with Jones. Cate also takes her own advice. Well, halfway. While Lux tells Bug about the kiss and demands that he treat her better, Cate tells Ryan that Baze tried to kiss her, but she didn’t sleep with him. In the end, Bug left and Ryan stayed.

Readers, was Cate right to lie to keep Ryan? Should Lux have told the truth? What did you think of The Cate and Ryan and Baze Show? Are you ready for a blowout? And what’s with all the Austins on this show?

-- Vlada Gelman (Follow my TV musings on Twitter: @stayingin)

Related:

Life Unexpected’: Slow and steady wins the race

Kerr Smith on being ‘Life Unexpected’s’ voice of reason, and the end of ‘Dawson’s’

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