For Rams on Friday, the Perfect Scenario? : Yes, Says Robinson With a Straight Face, but He Probably Wishes NFC West Crown Weren’t on the Line

Ram Coach John Robinson has an honest face. His intentions are usually sincere, his manner straightforward. If anything, Robinson has a pleasing habit of packaging answers with ribbons and boxes, even if not requested.

Ask Robinson the time and he’s likely to quote Pacific, Mountain, Central and Eastern. Question him about, say, the instant replay, and he immediately explains its many faults. This is the Robinson way.

So why do you get the feeling that his fingers were crossed Monday when discussing the Rams’ upcoming appointment with the San Francisco 49ers? For instance, this comment about the game that determines the winner of the NFC West:

Robinson: “You couldn’t ask for a better scenario. That’s the way it’s supposed to be.”

Translation: “Well, actually it could have been better. We could have beaten those crummy Miami Dolphins, but instead I’ve got to watch Dan Marino throw a jillion touchdown passes. We lose the game in overtime and now we’ve got to play the 49ers in that sandbox they call Candlestick Park.”

Robinson: “It’s like playing UCLA for the Rose Bowl.”

Translation: “Sure it is. It’s always that way here. Just once I’d like it to be like playing Oregon State.”

Robinson: “I see the game as even. I don’t see any give or take one way or the other. I think they’re healthy. They seem to be playing well. We’re OK healthwise and I think we’re playing well.”

Translation: “Healthy? They could film M*A*S*H here. My starting tight end is out. So is my starting wide receiver and H-back. My starting fullback still has the flu and who knows who gets it next. I bet Joe Montana doesn’t have the flu. Bad back, phooey. Let me see the X-rays.”

The Rams find themselves with assorted realities, most notably a disturbing inability to stop the Dolphins’ one-dimensional offense (Marino throws to fill-in-the-blank). Think the 49ers will notice?

Marino wasn’t particular. If the Rams dared him to beat their zone, he did it. When they switched to man-on-man coverage--something the Rams did often--Marino exploited that, too.

“We ran into a Dan Marino that was fabulous,” Robinson said. “Once they got us going defensively, you get to the point where . . . rigor mortis can set in and there’s almost nothing you can do.”

The toe tag read, 37-31, in favor of the Dolphins.

Even a day later, Robinson still marveled at Marino’s 403 yards of passing and 5 touchdowns. Yes, the Rams put pressure on him, he said. Yes, the man-on-man coverage was needed, for no other reason than to keep Marino interested. And yet . . .

“He was not only fantastic in what he did, but on the times that things could have gone real bad for him they went real good for him,” Robinson said. “There were times when you saw the ball up there and you said, ‘Oh, we’ve got it!’

“I said that three times. And somebody got it, but it wasn’t us. It just came down in the other guy’s hands. You say, ‘Oh, my gawd.’ When you’re looking at that on the other side, you say that’s luck. But it’s like when Larry Bird throws one over his shoulder and you say, ‘Hey, look at that luck.’ And it goes in. But you’ve got other guys practicing that stuff and it never goes anywhere.”

Now Robinson gets to watch Montana, who was absent from the Sept. 14 game against the Rams because of his celebrated back ailment. He’s fine now. Montana says so. Robinson agrees. “I think he’s 100%,” he said. “I think he’s been 100% for a long time. I think the way he plays, he’s 100%.”

So there you have it: 100%.

The same can’t be said of tight end Tony Hunter, wide receiver Ron Brown or running back Mike Guman. Hunter missed another game Sunday and won’t play against the 49ers. “He runs and he gets sore,” Robinson said. “Unless there’s a change, I wouldn’t expect him back.” Even healthy, Hunter would need several weeks to retain previous form, Robinson said.

Brown’s and Guman’s situation is less gloomy. Brown is nursing a separated shoulder and Guman is recovering from a knee injury. Whereas neither one will available for the 49er game, Guman began running this week, Robinson said. His status for the wild-card game should the Rams lose? “I don’t know,” he said. Brown, too, could possibly return in time for a wild-card game.

And Barry Redden, who didn’t play against the Dolphins because of the flu, should be fine for Friday’s game.

Good thing for the Rams, because Robinson said Redden’s absence lessened the Rams’ options in the running and passing game. Now Robinson only has to worry about the 10 to 12 other players who have flu symptoms. And, of course, the 49ers.

But that’s the way it’s supposed to be isn’t it? The perfect scenario and all that.