Woody Sometimes Had the Writers in Stitches

Following are a few quotes from Woody Hayes, one of sportsdom’s more quotable figures, who died this week at the age of 74:

--”I had a Cadillac offered to me a couple of times. You know how that works. They give you the Cadillac one year, and the next year they give you the gas to get out of town.”

--”We have gone as long as seven years without a fumble between the center and the quarterback. We’ve had two this season. That’s fourteen years shot to hell.”

--”I recruited a Czech kicker, and during the eye examination, the doctor asked him if he could read the bottom line. ‘Read it!’ the Czech kicker said. ‘I know him.’ ”

Add Hayes: Anne Hayes, his wife, also was very quotable. Here are a few:

--On speaking to a women’s club: “I always say that I am going to talk about sex and marriage, but being a football coach’s wife, I don’t know much about either.”

--To a heckler who said, “Your husband’s a fathead!”: “What husband isn’t?”

--Asked if she had ever considered divorce: “Divorce, no. Murder, yes.”

Trivia Time: Bob Bender, Duke assistant basketball coach, is the answer to what trivia question? (Answer below.)

From Mike Tully of United Press International: “The most remarkable stat quoted so far in spring training? It’s one you may have been missed over the winter. Toronto’s Tony Fernandez had 213 hits last year. That’s the biggest single-season output of any shortstop in major league history.”

Sorry, Mike, but Ceci1 Travis had 218 hits for the Washington Senators in 1941.

Former New York Yankees catcher Ron Hassey, chiding Butch Wynegar for his inability to handle the pressure in New York last season, told Marty Noble of Newsday: “‘I knew he was unhappy. But not to the point of going crazy, the point of needing psychiatric help. Every player goes through times when things go bad. It’s up to him to create some good things. You don’t blame the manager about how you’re handled because you create the way you’re handled.

“I didn’t appreciate some of the quotes from Butch. Just because Billy Martin and Lou Piniella yelled at him, he went crazy? New York can be tough because of the pressure to win. He said he might be better off someplace where there’s less pressure. Seattle or Cleveland. They want to win, don’t they?”

North Carolina basketball Coach Dean Smith, on his long-running feud with Atlantic Coast Conference official Lenny Wirtz: “I’ve been coaching 25 years, and we deserve a divorce.”

Trivia Answer: He is the only man to play in two NCAA championship games for different schools. He played for Indiana in an 86-68 win over Michigan in 1975-76, and for Duke in a 94-88 loss to Kentucky in 1977-78.

Quotebook

USC basketball Coach George Raveling, on Indiana Coach Bobby Knight: “Bobby Knight is a very good friend of mine. But if I ever need a heart transplant, I want his. It’s never been used.”