How to Write Good

The word folklore summons up in the imagination the look of homespun clothing and the sound of acoustical instruments. But folks will produce lore of one sort or another wherever they are. Alan Dundes, a distinguished Berkeley anthropologist some of whose work is extremely arcane, has collaborated with attorney and businessman Carl R. Pagter in collecting the usually anonymous urban folklore of the world most of us actually live in. “How to Write Good”--collected, they report, in 1968 in Kokomo, Ind . --appears in “When You’re Up to Your Ass in Alligators: More Urban Folklore From the Paperwork Empire” (Wayne State University Press: $25, hardcover; $9.95, paperback; 271 pp.), their second collection:

Subject and verb always has to agree.

Being bad grammar, the writer will not use dangling participles.

Prepositions should not be used to end sentences with.

Parallel construction with coordinate conjunctions is not only an aid to clarity but also is the mark of a good writer.

Do not use a foreign term when there is an adequate English quid pro quo.

If you must use a foreign term, it is de rigor to use it correctly.

It behooves the writer to avoid archaic expressions.

Do not use hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it effectively.

Avoid cliches like the plague.

Mixed metaphors are a pain in the neck and ought to be thrown out the window.

In scholarly writing, don’t use contractions.

A truly good writer is always especially careful to practically eliminate the too-frequent use of adverbs.

Use a comma before nonrestrictive clauses which are a common source of difficulty.

Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.

Parenthetical words however should be enclosed in commas.

Consult the dictionary frequently to avoid mispelling.