Higher Education OK but . . .

When San Diego Padres pitcher Eric Show attended UC Riverside, he was a busy young man.

“I was playing ball, playing guitar and taking courses in calculus, biology, chemistry, philosophy and physics,” he said.

He also was searching for the meaning of life.

“I accepted the fact that there was a God,” he said, “but which God--Allah, Buddha, Sri Chimnoy? I studied the Allen Watts movement, Zen, everything you can name. I studied the great works of St. Augustine, Freud, Voltaire, Russell, Marx.”

What motivated him the most?

“My main motivation,” he said, “was seeing how many girls I could conquer.”

Fairlyisms-of-the-Week: The latest from San Francisco Giants announcer Ron Fairly:

--”He takes a bunt for a called strike.”

--”That’s another example of the lack of speed the Giants have--or don’t have.”

Add Fairly: Here’s one from his days as an Angel announcer:

“Harrah makes the play. (Pause). That isn’t Harrah. Who is that down there? The third baseman makes the play.”

Trivia Time: Did Art Rooney ever own the Pittsburgh Pirates? (Answer below.)

From Friday’s USA Today: “Dennis (Oil Can) Boyd received a bottle of horse liniment to rub on his ailing shoulder from his mother, Sweetie Boyd, in Meridian, Miss.

“Mom knows best every time,” Oil Can said.

How true. That night, the Boston Red Sox pitcher beat Seattle, 5-3. It was his first victory in more than a month.

Vince Coleman of the St. Louis Cardinals, on his stolen-base race with Gerald Young of the Houston Astros: “When the leaves are turning brown, I’ll be wearing the crown.”

They’re both fast, they’re both named Willie and they both wear No. 83. If you were switching dials Friday night, you caught them both making touchdown catches.

Only moments after Willie Gault of the Raiders caught an 18-yarder from Steve Beuerlein in Chicago, Willie Anderson of the Rams hauled in a 54-yarder from Jim Everett in San Diego.

From Tim Kurkjian of the Baltimore Sun: “Cincinnati pitcher Tim Birtsas, who has a weight problem, drew the ire of Red Manager Pete Rose by ordering six White Castle hamburgers at midnight the night before an afternoon start. In that start, he gave up seven hits and seven runs in three innings.”

As a result, he spent part of last week patronizing the White Castles in Nashville, Tenn., before being recalled Saturday.

Add Kurkjian: “There are triple doubles, so how about backward triple doubles? Atlanta’s Gerald Perry was the first player to reach double figures in errors, times-caught-stealing and number of double plays grounded into. The first American Leaguer was Chicago’s Ozzie Guillen, who got there Wednesday night.”

Said San Francisco Giants Manager Roger Craig in Playboy: “I just don’t think women should be umpires, period. . . . I’d kill any player who ever called a daughter of mine the names I’ve been called by the umpires and the names I’ve called them.”

Trivia Answer: Yes, but not the baseball Pirates. His National Football League team was called the Pittsburgh Pirates from 1933 to 1940, when the name was changed to Steelers.

Quotebook

Montreal Expos Manager Buck Rodgers, comparing pitcher Pascual Perez to Mark Fidrych: “Pascual not only talks to the ball, he talks to the resin bag, the grass, planes going overhead and, once in a while, he even talks to his catcher and his manager.”