McGuire Credo: Never Mess With Little Guys

Al McGuire, who once worked as a bouncer at his mother’s tavern on Long Island, confesses he put his experience to use when he was coaching basketball at Marquette.

“Woody Hayes was an amateur compared to me,” he said. “I always thought a little fighting was good. Except, I never fought little guys.

“Once, I had two little 6-footers fighting in practice and I couldn’t get them to break it up. I said to one of them, ‘If you want to hit somebody, hit me, will you please?’ Well, the guy hit me. Never again did I mess with little guys.”

From Leigh Montville of the Boston Globe: “Hey, Doug Williams! Now that the season has finished on such a down note, where are you going this time? No Disney World, of course, but how about Canobie Lake Park? The rides are closed for the winter, but it would be a fine place to walk around and mope.”

Vicious.

More Montville: On the Indianapolis Colts: “Nice idea with the wishbone, Ron Meyer. You can go home and work out the wrinkles in the off-season. There’s going to be a lot of time. Maybe you can see what James Street is doing for a living these days. Maybe Julius Caesar Watts.”

Trivia Time: At his current pace, Magic Johnson of the Lakers will wind up leading the team in points, rebounds and assists. The number of players who have accomplished this feat in the NBA is which of the following: 12, 6, 3, 0? (Answer below.)

Wait a Minute: Michigan football Coach Bo Schembechler, trying to explain his 1-7 record in the Rose Bowl, told the New York Times: “You are always the visiting team. You are living in a hotel for a week, going to a strange locker room and playing on a strange field. That’s different, no matter how you add it up.”

It used to add up pretty good. Big, in fact. The first Michigan team that came to Pasadena beat Stanford, 49-0. The second one beat USC, 49-0.

San Francisco 49ers cornerback Ronnie Lott, a star basketball player at Eisenhower High School, said he thinks Michael Jordan, Karl Malone and Magic Johnson could make it as receivers in the NFL.

On Malone: “He’d be awesome as a tight end in our system. He can block and run, and he has great hands.”

On Magic: “He would be another Dwight Clark. He doesn’t have lightning speed, but he’d find the open spot because he’s Magic. And he could make all the catches.”

How-times-have-changed dept.: Said St. John’s basketball Coach Joe Lapchick after watching Lew Alcindor play as a sophomore at Power Memorial in New York: “He could become the greatest player ever. Someday, the pros will have to pay him $50,000 a year.”

Add Kareem: Asked why players don’t try to emulate his skyhook, he told the Boston Globe that women regard jump shots as “sexier” than hook shots.

“That’s why forwards and guards always get the girls,” he said.

Trivia Answer: Twelve. They are Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Sidney Moncrief, Dave Cowens, John Havlicek, Billy Cunningham, Wilt Chamberlain, Elgin Baylor, Oscar Robertson, Bob Kauffman, Dolph Schayes and Maurice Stokes. Baylor did it four times. Chamberlain did it twice and so has Bird.

Note: Bob Kauffman was a 6-8 center out of Guilford (N.C.) College who played for the Buffalo Braves. He averaged 20.4 points in 1970-71.

Quotebook

Former Cal football Coach Joe Kapp, on the broken collarbone he suffered when hit by a taxi while jogging in Los Gatos: “It could have been worse. The last I heard, the cab wasn’t hurt too badly.”