The job of city zoning analyst sounds...

The job of city zoning analyst sounds unexciting--unless your beat includes Sunset Boulevard.

Consider this blurb from an inspector who toured “an adult encounter establishment (bondage and discipline),” known as Chateau Order of Roissy, which was seeking a permanent operating permit:

“The Zoning Analyst observed many different types of wooden body racks where an individual can be hanged into the air with support only from the shoulders and wrists, as well as full body racks where an individual’s body is placed and wheeled around in a contorted fashion.

“The analyst also observed an approximate 4-foot by 4-foot by 3 1/2-foot-high wooden cage. The proprietor informed the analyst that the cage is used to restrain customers.”

Such eye-opening observations moved the intrepid Zoning Analyst to recommend that the permit be denied ( denied was underlined). Tuesday, the City Council agreed, voting to shut the place down.

In other words, it’s time for the Chateau Order of Roissy to hang ‘em up.

A month after the Lakers were swept by the Pistons in the NBA finals, Auburn Hills, Mich., Mayor Robert Grusnick arrived here to collect on a bet with Edward Vincent, his Inglewood counterpart.

Grusnick, wearing a shirt that boasted, “We Beat L.A.,” roared with laughter as Vincent slipped on a black Pistons “Bad Boys” shirt over his blue Oxford shirt and pink tie at the weekly Inglewood City Council meeting.

Meanwhile, on Kareem Court near the Forum, city workers were installing a free-standing 3-by-5-foot sign that Grusnick brought along. It said, “Hail to the 1989 NBA Champions--the Pistons of Auburn Hills, Mich.--the Bad Boys.” The sign is supposed to stand for 30 days, though the city hasn’t assigned a guard to watch over it.

Grusnick admitted that his own shirt drew some stares when he and his wife, Vivian, ate breakfast beforehand at a Denny’s in Inglewood.

“The waitress must have been a Lakers fan,” he said. “She seated us all the way in the back.”

Tuesday marked the debut of a metal detector at the entrance to the county Board of Supervisors meeting room, and the device ferreted out numerous nerds, accountants and lazy minds--everyone, in short, who was carrying a pocket calculator.

“Pocket calculators will do it every time,” one guard said.

Security officers were stationed at the entrances, checking briefcases and handbags of the estimated 100 spectators who attended the session.

The supes, themselves, entered through a back door. The precautions weren’t airtight. A photographer saw one woman casually stroll into the board room through a side door when the guards weren’t watching.

The searches turned up no weapons. But Roxanne Krause, a court reporter, was told she couldn’t take her pocket knife inside.

She agreed to store it in her car, while confiding to a reporter: “It comes in handy when you peel apples. That’s all I use it for.”

No word yet on when the $500-million B-2 stealth bomber is actually going to attempt to lift off into the air. Still, Air Force Maj. Pat Mullaney noted that the aircraft did achieve “a lot of firsts” when it taxied at speeds of up to 100 m.p.h. the other day in Palmdale.

“You have the first time (it was) under its own power,” Mullaney said. “You have it turning. All this has only been done before on computer simulations.”

Somehow, though, the stealth’s feat of executing a turn while on the ground didn’t quite seem to pack the drama of such previous firsts as, say, Chuck Yeager and his X-1 plane breaking the sound barrier four decades ago.

Sure, a lot of critics say Leo McCarthy, the Democratic lieutenant governor (remember him?), ran a lame, losing U.S. Senate campaign against Pete Wilson last year. But it seems a bit cruel of the Burbank-based state Republican Party to send McCarthy a computerized, fund-raising letter that said:

“George Bush, Pete Wilson and George Deukmejian could not be where they are today without you.”