Be It Budgets or the Series, Fence Is Best

Trust Vice President Dan Quayle to come right out and speak his mind when asked to pick a World Series winner.

Said Quayle: “I am vice president of all the United States.”

Intrepid reporters took another tack: Is Quayle, whose hometown of Huntington, Ind., is three hours from Cincinnati, a Reds fan?

Quayle: “I’m from Indiana, and of course there’s a lot of Cincinnati Reds fans in Indiana.”

The first pitch of the 1990 World Series is just a heartbeat away.

Trivia time: On this day in 1946, Enos Slaughter scored the deciding run from first base on a single as the St. Louis Cardinals defeated the Boston Red Sox, 4-3, in the seventh game of the World Series. Who got the hit?

Rowdy humor: In a promotional spot for ABC’s comedy series “Coach,” aired during last Monday night’s Cleveland-Denver game, actor Jerry Van Dyke, who plays an assistant college football coach on the show, commented that even if the Browns were to beat the Broncos, they would still lose “because they have to go back to Cleveland.”

Cleveland Mayor Michael White complained to Robert Iger, president of ABC Entertainment, calling the remark insensitive and disrespectful to the city.

Iger promised to air an apology the night of Oct. 22, when ABC’s Monday Night Football presents the Cincinnati at Cleveland game.

Continuing scandal: Unlike what happened at the end of the Colorado-Missouri game Oct. 6, there was no fifth down in college football Saturday, but there will be another in November . . . and December.

The Football Writers Assn. of America was formed in 1940, shortly after Cornell forfeited its “fifth down” victory to Dartmouth, and named its monthly publication (what else?) “The Fifth Down.”

Junk stats dept.: Jack O’Connell of the Hartford Courant, discussing the New York Yankees’ dismal season, quoted first baseman Don Mattingly, who was sidelined during most of the season because of an injured back.

Said Mattingly of the Yankees’ last-place effort: “Basically, it was a waste.”

Reinforcing the point with a true throwaway statistic, O’Connell noted that Mattingly’s replacement, Kevin Maas, set a major league record for fewest runs batted in by a player with 20 or more home runs. Maas had 21 homers and 43 RBIs in 254 at-bats.

Flower power: Los Angeles in 1984 had its Peter Ueberroth. Beijing in 1990 has its schoolchildren.

Reuter reported that kids were required to buy the wilting flowers used to decorate the city during the Asian Games, which closed Oct. 7.

Bunches of chrysanthemums, daisies and dahlias were sold on street corners for 30 cents.

That’s no excuse: Alan Prosser might be stuck with the distinction of being the worst soccer goalie in the British Isles.

In London Thursday, Prosser, 19, gave up 31 goals as his Siliconx Sports and Social team lost, 33-1, in Division Seven of Swansea’s Sunday League, bringing his eight-game total of goals against to 131.

Said Prosser of Thursday’s performance: “It was not all my fault. Our defenders were invisible.”

Artistic victory: Cathy Gerring finished with a 278 to defeat Beth Daniel by one stroke Sunday in the LPGA World Championship at Cely, France.

The golfers kept their concentration, but that’s not to say there weren’t distractions.

Millions of dollars worth of sculpture, including works by Joan Miro and Pierre-Auguste Renoir, decorate the course at the Cely Golf Club.

Trivia answer: Harry (the Hat) Walker.

Quotebook: Harry Shearer, closing Sunday’s edition of “Le Show” on KCRW-FM: “The question now is: Which will happen first? Will the price of gasoline reach $2.00 a gallon, or will someone score 200 points against the Denver Nuggets?”