Righetti Has New Perspective : Parenthood: Birth of triplets is cause for celebration, but complications are concern.
Joy one moment, fear the next. Celebration and concern. Happy visions of a sweet life five years from now; deep concern about the immediate future. The pendulum swings back and forth from minute to minute, and Dave Righetti has no choice but to ride it.
“It’s fun and it pulls at you at the same time,” Righetti said, acknowledging that restful sleep has not been easily achieved in the last week. His mind never rests.
Righetti became a father a week ago Friday, and parenthood has brought with it uncommon, if not unique, circumstances. Righetti is the father of triplets. And that’s the part he was prepared to handle. The questions, the wonder and the weight of parental worry that have accompanied the births, more than two months premature, of two daughters and a son, are something else again.
The questions deal with the births of Natalee Jean, Nicolette Kay and Wesley David--”All in the 2-pound 5-ounce range,” Righetti said--and how it came to be that Kayla Campbell, the sister of Righetti’s wife, gave birth to the triplets.
“One of the (New York) papers actually made it sound like I impregnated my sister-in-law,” he said, shaking his head.
The wonder is that of the birth itself and how conception was achieved through in vitro fertilization, using Righetti’s sperm and his wife’s eggs. And the worry is in the complications Natalee Jean has experienced. “It’s a little touch and go,” he said earlier in the week. “She had a good day today.”
So did Daddy. Almost. It was another day of ambivalence for him. And there was more to come. Because Righetti is who he is, this private experience has seeped into the public domain. Before the births, only a few people outside the family knew of the situation. “People were asking why we were getting such a big house and a four-door car,” Righetti said.
And since the birth, in Southern California, Righetti has answered more questions than he wanted to hear. “We haven’t even said what hospital,” he said. “But the hospital is getting a lot of inquiries.”
Righetti wants to share the experience, to a degree. Matt Fischer, the Giants’ media relations director, then informed--warned--Righetti that “Oprah” had called. Righetti said “Good Morning, America” had contacted him, too.
“You’re big,” Fischer told Righetti. “Wait till you see how little I can be,” Righetti said.
“There’s so much that we want to keep private and not bring attention to such a sensitive thing,” said Righetti, who was in Montreal at the time of the delivery. So he characterizes Natalee’s troubles as “typical complications that a premature baby has” and explains in general terms the circumstances that led to his 28-year-old sister-in-law giving birth. His wife, Kandice, was able to conceive but not carry a fetus. “God cut her a little bit short,” Righetti said.
“I’ve known about it for a long time. The second time we went out, we talked about it. She’s known about it since she was a teen-ager. Her sisters told her they would help. I think, at one time or another, every female in her family volunteered.
“We thought about going the surrogacy route, but that was going to be a strange endeavor, a lot of shady people involved. But we talked to Kayla about it. She just had her own child (now 17 months old). We talked to her husband. We were all very excited about it. She’s a very stable person.”
There were complications before the births, as well. Kayla spent time in the hospital. Not long after the Righettis learned of the pregnancy, they also learned a full-term pregnancy was unlikely and that Kayla was at some risk. And when Righetti was summoned to pitch against the New York Mets a week ago Wednesday at Shea Stadium, he went to work knowing Kayla had been readmitted. “I let myself down that day,” he said. “I had nothing. I thought I should be able to block all of that out.”
Instead, Kevin McReynolds hit a home run against him in the eighth inning, and the Mets beat him in the ninth. He used the word perspective when he explained his feelings of that day. “I’m still not sure how I’m going to react now,” he said this week. “I guess I will because I have to. But I know (Natalee) is having trouble. It’s not easy.”
Four years ago, Righetti’s greatest concerns were about saving games for the New York Yankees and dealing with George Steinbrenner.
Now there is much more to life, and despite the feeling of helplessness as his newborns lie in incubators, the other side of parenthood is all over his face.
“They’re our kids. I’m a father,” he said. “We’ll need more cigars.”
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