He’s Too Much : David Klingler’s Numbers Are Incredible, but Numbers May Not Be Everything

And now, University of Houston quarterback David Klingler reveals the intricate secrets of the “multiple adjusting passing offense,” a souped-up run-and-shoot system so successful and so guarded that his coach uses a paper shredder to destroy old playbook diagrams.

A chalk-talk drum roll, please, as Klingler prepares to tell all.

“Uh,” said Klingler, “Get open. I’ll say, ‘I’m gonna roll out. Get open, I’ll find you.’ ”

That’s it? That’s what all the fuss is about-- Get open ? That’s why half of America’s college coaches tsk-tsk-tsk themselves into a frenzy whenever Houston sets scoreboards aflame? That’s why Klingler might win a Heisman Trophy . . . or might not, depending on the score-till-you-drop voter backlash? That’s why Cougar Coach John Jenkins is considered a cult hero by some and an egotistical, motor-mouth Texan by others?

Can’t be.

It is. In fact, the Houston offense actually contains a play that comes straight from the days when kids dodged Buicks while catching passes in the middle of the street. The Cougar version has Klingler turning to his five receivers and simply saying, “Get open.”

And they do. Last season, Klingler found enough open receivers to break or tie 33 NCAA single-season or game records. If you are keeping count--and they are at Houston--that is 22more than Brigham Young’s Ty Detmer, who happened to win the 1990 Heisman.

Of course, Houston isn’t without its very special problems. For instance, where else can a guy throw for more than 5,000 yards, which is what Klingler did a season ago, and get ripped by his own receivers?

It happens inside those chaotic Houston psuedo-huddles, where it seems Cougar receivers are forever moaning to Klingler about his choice of targets. Why, no one knows. After all, the eighth-ranked Houston wide receiver caught 35 passes last season.

Still, it’s never enough. A typical on-field exchange, courtesy of Klingler:

Receiver: “Hey, man, I was open. Why didn’t you get me the ball?”

Klingler: “Because you weren’t the deepest.”

Receiver: “Oh.”

In a nutshell, the Houston passing philosophy.

Klingler threw 54 touchdown passes last season, which is five more than the combined 1990 totals of Florida State’s Casey Weldon, Notre Dame’s Rick Mirer, UCLA’s Tommy Maddox and USC’s Todd Marinovich. This season, Klingler already has nine touchdown throws--in one game, a 73-3 victory over Louisiana Tech. Six of the scores came in one quarter.

“There’s been several ballgames that you could take pieces of and it would be perfection,” Jenkins said. “That second quarter (in the season opener on Aug. 31) was one of them. I mean, six touchdowns in one quarter? Are you kidding me?”

Poor Louisiana Tech. The Bulldogs are still stumbling around their Ruston campus in a daze.

Houston and Klingler can do that to a team. Any team. The Cougars averaged 41 points against their eight Southwest Conference opponents last season. Against non-conference opponents, Houston averaged 61 points.

“Not much form or fashion sometimes, but it works,” Klingler said.

Actually, it numbs. After a while, the mind-boggling statistics lose their meaning. Against Louisiana Tech, Klingler threw for 510 yards. Do that at Nebraska and they would declare a state holiday. At Houston, they yawn.

So confident are Houston’s cocky wide receivers, they taunt their own teammates on defense. Said Marcus Grant to Cougar cornerback Jerry Parks during a recent practice: “Can’t none of you cover me?”

Parks led the nation in interceptions last season.

But forget the numbers and the taunting for a moment. Instead, remember this: Klingler is back for a final try at the Heisman Trophy. Jenkins, who signed a lifetime contract with the university, is talking about taking his offense “to the next level,” which can only mean triple digits. And Houston is off NCAA probation, making the Cougars eligible for postseason play and an asterisk-free run at a national championship.

Of course, Klingler and Jenkins have some work to do, beginning with tonight’s game against No. 2-ranked Miami at the Orange Bowl. The Hurricanes, you will recall, are the same bad boys who roughed up Texas in the Cotton Bowl last New Year’s Day. And wasn’t it Texas that handed Houston its only loss of the 1990 season?

Also, Cougar critics like to mention that eight of Houston’s 10 victories last year came over teams with losing records. Never mind that three of those teams would have had winning records if not for their losses to the Cougars.

But this is nit-picking. A victory over Miami would render past criticism moot. A loss would bring a chorus of “I told you so.”

As for Klingler, Miami Coach Dennis Erickson guarantees a Heisman for the Houston star should the Cougars win tonight.

“Just give it to him,” Erickson said. “Really, that’s what I think.”

Good thing Erickson is thinking about the Heisman because Klingler doesn’t seem to be. Klingler recently told Sports Illustrated that the trophy would make a nifty doorstop, but nothing more. By the way, that noise you just heard was the New York Athletic Club president fainting.

And earlier this week, in the same room where you can find the Heisman Trophy of former Houston quarterback Andre Ware, Klingler said he would have probably voted for Detmer last year.

“Anyway, trophies don’t mean much if you don’t win games,” Klingler said.

Told of Klingler’s personal Heisman ballot, Jenkins rolls his eyes. “Ah, he’s just being modest.”

Klingler has always been that way. Or so it seemed until one day when he reported to the Houston sports information department for his almost daily interview requests.

“Just one interview today, right?” Klingler said politely.

“David, you’ve got six,” the secretary said.

“ Six ? I’m not doing them!”

And then mild-mannered Klingler walked out and slammed the door behind him.

Moments later, you could hear him giggling down the hall.

And all six interviews were graciously completed.

Maybe it’s his humble football beginnings. A former wishbone quarterback at Houston’s Stratford High, he accepted the Cougar scholarship offer partly because he wanted to stay close to home, partly because of the coaching staff and partly because of run-and-shoot highlight video Jenkins showed him. The video featured then-USFL Houston Gambler Jim Kelly, who, under the guidance of Jenkins, set several all-time pro football passing records.

“I didn’t know what to think,” said Klingler, who threw five passes a game in high school--if he was lucky. “It looked kind of complicated.”

It is and it isn’t. The way Klingler explains the system, a quarterback reads the defense, pinpoints its weakness and throws to that area. Then the quarterback repeats the process about 60 times a game. Easy, right?

Not exactly. It took Klingler a full two years to learn the Jenkins run-and-shoot system and another year before Klingler would replace Ware, who left school early to join the NFL.

Jenkins knew Klingler was ready back in 1988, though it took a while for the coach to realize it.

While preparing the Cougars for the 1988 Aloha Bowl, Jenkins moved Klingler to the scout team to run the plays of their opponent, Washington State. That is where Klingler stayed the entire week, missing every minute of run-and-shoot practice and team-meeting time. The day before the game, Jenkins handed each of his quarterbacks a 350-page notebook filled with empty grid charts. Their assignment: Draw all the offensive formations, include the exact alignments of each player, provide a description of every possible defense and detail the reaction of each of those defenders.

“I nearly felt guilty giving him that workbook,” Jenkins said. “But dang if that son of a gun didn’t miss a thing. Not a thing.”

So impressed was Jenkins with Klingler’s grasp of the offense, he saved the workbook. Two seasons later, he made Klingler his starter.

“People were coming up to me and saying, ‘What you going to do now without Andre?’ ” Jenkins said. “Hey, I’m sitting there grinning like a possum. I’m waiting for him to light up the scoreboard.”

Klingler didn’t merely light it up, he caused it to malfunction. The possibilities of the game changed every time he dropped back to pass. Whoever heard of nine touchdown passes and 510 yards passing in 20 minutes, which is about how long Klingler had time of possession in the opener against Louisiana Tech.

And despite Louisiana Tech’s low national profile, the Bulldogs won eight games in 1990, lost to Auburn by only two points and tied Maryland in the Independence Bowl. Hardly a profile of a champion, but not bad, either.

The natural reaction by outsiders was to dismiss the Houston victory as another scoring sham. But look at the time of the nine touchdown drives Klingler engineered: 67 yards in 2:13, 60 yards in 22 seconds, 57 yards in 2:49, six yards in four seconds, 59 yards in 26 seconds, six yards in 11 seconds, 71 yards in 1:43, 55 yards in 2:19 and 79 yards in 2:14.

As Jenkins would say: “Are you kidding me?”

The scary part is that Klingler swears it could have been worse.

“Maybe once we ought to run it up just so people know what running it up is,” he said.

Klingler quit trying to figure out how to stop the Houston offense long ago. According to his calculations, it can’t be done--at least, not without the considerable help of the Cougar players themselves.

Nor does Klingler spend much time on the complexities of life. Given his choice, he would do quite nicely without the demands of college football. With the help of a couple of buddies, he taught himself how to play golf this summer. A few weeks ago, he shot 76.

But his real love is freshwater fishing.

“If they would have given me a full fishing scholarship, I think I would have taken it,” Klingler said.

No such luck. He is stuck with football, which isn’t such a terrible fate. If all goes as expected, Klingler probably will be the first choice in next year’s NFL draft, unless, of course, Bruce McNall starts waving his Toronto Argonaut checkbook again.

Until then, Klingler enjoys his special partnership with Jenkins, the mad scientist. Together they have created an offense that apparently has no limits and no shortage of nonbelievers.

“I’ve heard all the talk: ‘You can’t throw the ball and win,’ “Jenkins said. “That’s the old school. To me, it’s amazing how many of them still cling to that.”

Jenkins leans back in his chair. He has that possum look again.

Klingler at a Glance

A look at some of the NCAA records established by Houston’s David Klingler

Most yards in total offense in a season: 5,221 (1990)

Most yards in total offense, per game: 474.6 (1990)

Most yards passing, single game: 716 (Dec. 2, 1990 vs. Arizona State)

Most yards in total offense, single game: 732 (Dec. 2, 1990 vs. Arizona State)

Most passing attempts, season: 643 (1990)

Most completions, season: 374 (1990)

Most completions, game: 48 (Oct. 20, 1990 vs. Southern Methodist)

Most touchdown passes, season: 54

Most touchdown passes, game: 11 (Nov. 17, 1990 vs. Eastern Washington)

Most touchdown passes, quarter: 6 (Aug. 31, 1991 vs. Louisiana Tech)