OC SPOTLIGHT : SEA RATIONS : Water With Dinner? You Can Eat Aboard Anything From a Gondola to an Ocean Liner

When I got the assignment to do a story about dining at venues that literally float on water, I immediately became queasy. It isn’t that I get seasick. During my misspent youth, I labored, briefly, as a waiter aboard a Norwegian-based ocean liner.

Passengers on these ships pay princely sums to take away memories of exotic ports of call; Rio’s Sugarloaf Mountain, Hong Kong at night, Curacao in the mist. What I recall are sharks at a feeding frenzy: people eating their way through cabin breakfasts, deck lunches, six-course dinners and midnight snacks that lasted until sunup.

The Orange County area has lots of places for dining on the water, and it isn’t even necessary to pack a suitcase. I’ve recently been out on Newport Harbor in a chartered yacht, lolled sound asleep on a boat moored off Lido Isle, and dined among friends in a stately wood-paneled room aboard the Queen Mary. Now I can finally say it with authority: The passengers have a better time.

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Worldwide Boat and Breakfast: At first, the idea of paying to sleep on someone else’s yacht may strike you as a bit daffy. Chances are you’ll feel differently once aboard.

A plucky woman named Vili Boyadjiev recently had the bright idea to lease luxury crafts moored off Lido Isle, freshen them up and turn them into individual bed-and-breakfast inns. Most of these boats are big and luxuriously appointed; prices (for one night, double occupancy) range from $95 to around $400, including breakfast. So far, business is booming.

Once you step aboard, sometime in the late afternoon (usually around 3 p.m.), the boat is yours until approximately 11 a.m., roughly the same as check-out time in your average hotel. The rules are few: no smoking, no cooking and no bringing unregistered guests aboard for the night. Apart from that, and taking the boat out for a joy ride (this is a stationary rental, remember), you can do virtually anything you wish.

I like just relaxing on deck, watching the sun go down. In the morning, Boyadjiev or one of her crew brings you a basket full of fruit, freshly baked pastries from a local bakery and assorted other goodies. Just order your breakfast the way you would in a hotel, specifying the time.

All Boyadjiev’s yachts come equipped with a coffee machine and various hot-beverage fixings, a working marine radio, TVs, VCRs, towels, toiletries and at least one well-appointed stateroom. I slept like a baby on a 37-footer called Thunderbird, a cozy all-wood beauty just under Delaney’s Wharf. That boat goes for $150 a night; $325 gets you aboard Genesis, a 58-foot motor yacht with two large aft decks, a flybridge perfect for sunning, and a spectacular view of the harbor.

Boyadjiev will allow you to share the larger boats for an additional charge of $25 per person. She will also arrange floral bouquets, fruit and wine baskets and other amenities, at varying costs.

3400 Via Oporto, Suite 103 in Newport Beach. Rates: approximately $95 to $350 per night for two people; tax and gratuities extra. For information, call (800) BOAT-BED.

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Hornblower Yacht Cruises: The Hornblower Co. provides the only nightly a la carte dinner cruises in Orange County. Five years ago, this was a relatively small operation. Today, it is an industry giant, with a fleet of five boats sailing out of Newport, San Diego, Marina del Rey and Long Beach.

The format is simple: You board a boat such as the Lord Hornblower about 7 p.m. to set sail at 7:30. Cruises, primarily around Newport Harbor, last 2 1/2 hours. On busy evenings, there are up to 300 passengers, so it feels like being on a real ocean liner. Service begins almost immediately after the boat sets sail--a three-course dinner consisting of a salad, a duet of filet mignon and poached salmon, and a dessert (chocolate cake or something equally non-controversial).

Because of the number of people, the management has simplified the a la carte service here, both to increase efficiency and to appeal to a broader customer base. When I sailed a few years back, I sampled dishes such as salmon with baby clams, chicken with morels, and tenderloin of beef in a pastry crust with fresh rosemary. There is nothing nearly as imaginative at the moment, but a change in chefs is due to be announced soon.

The entertainment, however, is quite a bit more elaborate than the last time I sailed, when mostly recorded music or the occasional three-piece combo was featured. On Aug. 1, cruises will begin offering “Broadway Off the Menu,” an interactive show featuring four musical comedy artists. Audience members get a ballot of songs, then choose what they want to hear by vote. Other options after dinner include strolling the deck or watching the captain navigate the narrow canal from the Point to Lido Marina.

2431 W. Coast Highway, Newport Beach. Rates: $54.50 per person for dinner cruises, $35 per person for Sunday brunch buffet cruise (drinks cost extra, although brunch includes one glass of champagne per diner). Both prices include tax and port fees; gratuities are extra. For dinner reservations call (714) 631- 2469.

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Sir Winston at the Queen Mary: At one point in the ‘30s, the stately Queen Mary was considered the most luxurious cruise ship in the world. Even by today’s standards, this 1,019-foot, 81,237-ton behemoth is a magnificent attraction, dwarfing nearly all of the love boats you can see in the nearby Port of Los Angeles.

Visiting the Queen Mary in Long Beach is an incomparable experience. Since the $17.50 admission fee was rescinded a while back (after Howard Hughes’ Spruce Goose, the giant flying boat that was the other half of this duel-admission ticket, was moved to McMiniville, Ore.), the food service operators on the ship report that business is better than ever. And why not? One can chow down on burgers and hot dogs from deckside snack stands, enjoy breakfast, lunch or dinner at the Promenade Cafe, or sip drinks and nibble on snacks at the magnificently appointed Deco-style bar, possibly the most beautiful room on the ship.

Five of us committed a tactical error and dined one Friday evening in the first-class, upstairs dining room, Sir Winston’s. Despite a prime view of the fireworks display (Fridays and Saturdays only, at dusk) and a warm, lustrous all-wood interior, it’s not a room I would urge everyone to visit.

The atmosphere is unforgettable, and it is fun to imagine how the royals lived in pre-war Europe. That notwithstanding, this is a shatteringly expensive place to dine, and none too interesting in culinary terms. A rack of lamb with a mustard herb crust, for instance, is a whopping $67.50 for two, and many other entrees--broiled swordfish with two minuscule lumps of caviar, and beef tenderloin with an insipid tarragon sauce--are well over $20 apiece. Service is obsequious without being totally efficient.

Sir Winston’s at the Queen Mary, 1126 Queens Highway, Long Beach. Dinner from 5 to 10 p.m. nightly. There is a dress code (jackets for men, no jeans, etc.). Full bar. All major cards accepted. Dinner for two, $60 to $90 without drinks. (310) 435-3511.

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The Gondola Company of Newport: When the night air is balmy and the mood is just right, nothing is more romantic than a gondola ride through the canals of Newport Beach. And don’t worry, you won’t have to do the rowing yourself. What this company offers is an oar-powered one-hour cruise for two or more in an authentic Venetian gondola, with a gondolier dressed up in Venetian-style finery and a basket of French bread, cheese, salami, a well-stocked ice bucket and glasses. You provide your own beverage.

You meet the gondolier at the company office (behind the Edwards Lido cinema in Lido Village), and he will escort you to the boat. Most cruises begin after 4 p.m., although technically the cruises can start as early as 11 a.m. if you make special arrangements. Gondolas carry up to six people, should you want to bring friends. The charge is $60 for the first two people and $15 for each additional person.

For those acquainted with the original Gondola Getaways company in Long Beach, this franchise--which opened in May--is operated by a partnership that includes David Black, an owner of the Long Beach company.

If you want to make your ride really eccentric, try this: Japanese bento lunch boxes make the perfect light supper, and you can stock up on them at Daikichi Sushi in Costa Mesa. For $5.50, they’ll pack up a fried pork cutlet, two kinds of pickles, pot stickers, shumai pork dumplings and rice studded with black sesame seeds--not to mention chopsticks, ginger, soy sauce and other accouterments. A mere quarter more will get you anago chirashi, an assorted sushi box featuring sea eel, yellowtail and other goodies.

3400 Via Oporto 103B, Newport Beach. Open 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. daily. Gondolas can be reserved from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. daily by calling (714) 675-1212.

Japanese lunch boxes are sold at Daikichi Sushi in the Yaohan Market, 665 Paularino Ave., Costa Mesa. Open daily, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. (714) 557-6699.

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Charley Brown’s: At Charley Brown’s, until recently Reuben E. Lee, you dine suspended over a corner of Newport Harbor in a Mississippi riverboat, within spitting distance of Coast Highway. It doesn’t take an earthquake to make the chandeliers on this ersatz Mississippi sternwheeler rock gently from side to side. Just some clown on a Jet-Ski hotdogging it too close to the Coast Highway.

This is a noisy, family-oriented restaurant that attracts lots of kids and tourists. I must have talked with 50 people at the downstairs bar one Saturday night. Not one was local. You’ll have fun and even eat reasonably well if you don’t mind loud noise and don’t order anything too fancy.

The upstairs dining room has a darkish fin de siecle decor--a bit tawdry like a French Quarter bordello--and lots of cushy semi-circular booths to sink into. On weekends, there will be a Dixieland band thumping down below in the bar. Sunday brunch is a massive affair here--carved beef and turkey, a pasta bar, a waffle station, a fajita station and much more, all for $16.95 for adults, $5.95 for kids ages 5 to 12.

Prime rib is the specialty at night, and it is actually pretty fair blackened. There are also three shrimp dishes, broiled chicken and the usual smattering of all-American entrees--ribs, plain broiled fish and the like. If the kids don’t go gaga over their complementary balloons or desserts such as Toll House cookie pie, the adults will when they taste the rich Jack Daniels chocolate pecan pie. Wash a piece down with a surprisingly good espresso from the imaginative full-service bar.

151 E. Coast Highway, Newport Beach. Lunch Monday through Saturday, 11:30 a.m. to 4 p.m.; dinner Sunday through Friday, 4 to 10 p.m., Friday and Saturday till 11 p.m.; Sunday brunch 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. All major cards accepted. Dinner for two, $24 to $45 without drinks. (714) 675-5790.

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Balboa Bay Cruises and Newport Clipper: Last, there are those private charters, primarily available for big groups. Balboa Bay Cruises and Newport Clipper are two companies that specialize in this type of rental, done mainly by the hour and prohibitive to anyone without an expense account or the budget for a major event.

Ken Guilford tried to run a la carte jazz cruises on his well-appointed 80-foot vessel, Newport Clipper. The boat, which holds about a hundred people, sports new fabric chairs, state-of-the-art audio and video equipment and all-glass windows on the upper deck, affording good views of the Bay. But it turned out that there was just too much competition. Now the Clipper is available for happy hours, family reunions, corporate dinners and the like. Guilford does not cook on board, so you choose the caterer (or let him).

The address is 3101 W. Coast Highway, Newport Beach. Rates: approximately $400 per hour weekdays, $550 per hour weekends. (714) 722-9200.

Balboa Bay Cruises offers a once-a-month two-hour sunset cruise on a double-deck party boat called the Tiki, which looks like one of those wooden tiki gods from a distance. You pay one price, $39.95 per person, and that includes full bar, dancing to live entertainment, sandwiches, fruit and side salads. The cruise leaves at 7 p.m. from the Fun Zone on Balboa Peninsula, returning at 9 p.m. The next one is this Saturday, followed by another on Aug. 21. The Tiki and other boats in this fleet are also available for private charter. The Tiki can accommodate 75 to 100 people. Rates, including food and full bar, are approximately $5,000 for two hours.

You can write to Balboa Bay Cruises at P.O. Box 586, Balboa, CA, 92661. Or call (714) 680-9987 for more information.