THE NBA / MARK HEISLER : In Harper-Clippers Feud, There Are No Winners

It’s difficult to choose sides in the standoff between Ron Harper and the Clippers.

On one hand, you have Harper, the $4-million ingrate, slouching through what undoubtedly has become his last Clipper season, moaning all the while that they haven’t already re-signed him, that head bean counter Andy Roeser is out to get him, that the Sports Arena isn’t suitable, etc.

On the other hand, you have the Clippers, the Little Shop of Horrors, who have failed to build a program their players could believe in.

A fool and his money, or the Clippers and a young star, are soon parted. Charles Smith, gone. Ken Norman, gone. Danny Manning, going. Harper, going. Mark Jackson signed a five-year extension this season, took a look at the way things were going around here and started wishing out loud for a trade. In a season or two, they will have to oblige him; he will be 29 or 30, and they will be rebuilding.

When Manning and Harper blew off that practice, Coach Bobby Weiss did the right thing and benched them, although he called their excuses “relatively legitimate.”

Actually, they had no excuses. A practice had been scheduled for 4:30 just to give players time to fly home. Manning overslept (agent Ron Grinker had the good grace to admit Manning was wrong, even if he blamed the Clippers for everything else).

Harper missed his plane back from Cleveland, leading to this priceless exchange with reporters:

Harper: “The rule now is if you miss practice and nobody died in your family, you can’t play the next day. I don’t care if you’re sick, you have to bring your . . . in.”

Q: Were you sick?

Harper: “No, I was healthy. I just missed my flight and I don’t feel sorry I missed it.”

At least, Weiss made his point without going to war with his two stars. However, when Harper went off on another of his self-pitying bleats, referring to the balance of the season as “jail time,” the organization lost suspended him.

The NBA Players Assn. promptly filed a grievance, arguing that a player has the right to say he’s unhappy. Harper didn’t criticize anyone; he only said he wanted out, for which he was fined, in effect, $48,780.49.

The Clippers don’t know if they can win a grievance and don’t care. There were sending everyone a message.

What now?

Only four more shopping days until the trade deadline. The Clippers have an assortment of low-ball offers for Manning. Chicago’s Scottie Pippen wants the Bulls to trade for Harper. Harper hasn’t guarded anything but a passing lane for years, but Pippen believes that in a real program, he would go back to playing honestly. He may be right, too.

It wasn’t always this way. Remember when Harper arrived in November of 1989 and led the Clippers on that East Coast winning streak? He was averaging 23 points when he blew out his knee that January. Until then, he really was the next thing to Michael Jordan, but after that, it was only in his mind.

He still had something, though. There was no one like him on the fast break.

But of Harper’s last season with the Clippers, all you can say is: They deserved each other.

THIS JUST IN: SNAKE’S HOMESICK!

Just when you thought the door only swung one way comes a Milwaukee Journal report that Norman, now on Mike Dunleavy’s yo-yo, wants to be traded, maybe back to the Clippers.

“If it were true,” Norman said, “whether it’s true or not, it’s something that would be discussed within the family.”

We will take that as a confirmation. However, Norman is signed for six seasons, and Dunleavy said he has no intention of trading a player just because he’s unhappy.

Resigned, Norman went back to work with the Bucks.

“Somehow, I have to get my hungriness back, my aggressiveness,” he said before last week’s game against the Denver Nuggets. “I have to be prepared to go in there and tear someone’s head off or get mine torn off.”

That night, he entered the game at the start of the second quarter, got into a fight with Tom Hammonds 1:39 later and was ejected.

OK, Snake, the aggressiveness is back. Now work on the basketball.

FOR THE LAKERS, THE NEW MATH

The Lakers are more or less denying that they offered a choice of Anthony Peeler and Doug Christie, plus Elden Campbell and a No. 1 draft choice, for Derrick Coleman.

Their logjam at small forward and big guard, however, suggests otherwise. With the amazing development of George Lynch, they suddenly have two No. 2 guards for one spot.

Fortunately, the Nets weren’t interested. The Lakers like to think their tradition can mellow out a problem player, but this guy looks like he would be $100 million worth of trouble in the kingdom of Heaven.

What to do when Christie and Peeler are back? Answer: Play them, even at the cost of sitting down Sedale Threatt and Tony Smith.

The hard-nosed Smith is their best defender. Threatt, 32, won two of the three games in the recent streak, almost single-handedly outgunning the Phoenix Suns and Utah Jazz in the fourth quarter, outscoring John Stockton and Kevin Johnson, 51-21.

There’s still an incredible hunger for anything resembling respectability at the Forum, and soon the P word--as in playoffs --was being heard, pressing Coach Randy Pfund to play Threatt more.

But you’re not rebuilding if you’re playing veterans ahead of genuine prospects. Pfund could use Christie as the backup at the point, shooting guard and small forward positions and find 36 minutes a night for Christie, Lynch, Peeler and Nick Van Exel.

Everyone knows the Lakers’ kids are their future. Let’s get to it.

NEW MATH II

Van Exel is shooting 40%, right?

Well, not exactly.

With players taking more and more three-pointers, the old shooting percentage is becoming a less valid measure of a player’s performance.

Since a player gets an extra point, a 33% mark from the three-point line equals 50% from inside it.

Almost one-third of Van Exel’s shots come from beyond the arc, so his overall percentage will be lower.

How to measure it in a single percentage? Jordan Cohn, author of the annual “Pro Basketball Bible,” has devised a “true shooting percentage,” which weights three-pointers. For every three-pointer a player makes, you add half a field goal. Thus, if a player was one for two inside the arc and one for two on three-pointers, he would have a true shooting percentage of 62.5%.

By this measure, Van Exel is shooting 45%.

THAT’LL SHOW HIM

The NBA’s hottest team?

The Spurs, winners of 22 of 25, 11 in a row.

They still don’t have a real point guard, but David Robinson is having an MVP season, raising his scoring average four points from last season in reply to Coach John Lucas’ taunts to show him something.

Robinson leads the NBA with five triple-doubles and last week compiled the first quad-double (34 points, 10 rebounds, 10 assists, 10 blocks) in four seasons.

The Spurs have replaced New York as the league’s top defensive team. A year ago, they were middle-of-the-pack rebounders but are now No. 3. This is attributable to Dennis Rodman, who’s 25% ahead of the field but was left off the All-Star team in this season’s greatest miscarriage of justice. Just because a man dies his hair several colors, tattoos his arms, comes late to everything, skips shootarounds on the theory he isn’t going to shoot, doesn’t talk to teammates and snaps out occasionally, it doesn’t mean he isn’t great.

As wacky as he is, Rodman wins. Last season, the Pistons were 36-26 with him, 4-16 without him. Since he left, they’re 12-38.

ALL-STAR WRAPUP

Biggest hype: Isaiah Rider’s between-the-legs dunk. The crowd’s reaction won him the competition.

Most in-character reaction: Rider, who said: “When I was drafted, I said I was going to win the slam-dunk contest and I did. I backed it up. I’ve got to love myself for that.”

Worst new idea: Trying to save the dunk contest with MC’s Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff. This turkey needs more than two guys with baseball caps on backward yelling, “Give it up, y’all!”

Best new idea: Dropping the dunk contest to No. 2, making the three-point contest the featured event on All-Star Saturday. A better idea would be moving the dunk contest to Friday.

Best performance: Mark Price hitting 20 of his first 22 in the three-point contest.

Second-best performance: David Stern schmoozing Minnesota Gov. Arne Carlson, seated next to him at the game. The best bet is the Timberwolves will stay in Minneapolis, the city and state will find themselves in the arena business.

Worst prediction: Three-point contestant Steve Kerr: “I figure I’ve got the advantage. I’m the only one who really needs the money.”

Worst performance: Nike. More than anything else, the game is an exhibition of the shoe makers’ new models. Nike’s collection of the grotesque included Pippen’s red clodhoppers--”The first thing I said to him was, ‘Take those shoes off! “ Robinson said; the Air Jordans that made B.J. Armstrong and Mitch Richmond look like little old ladies in sneakers and Latrell Sprewell’s black high-tops that looked like combat boots.

Second worst performance: The game went up against the opening ceremonies of the Winter Olympics and drew a 9.1 rating, down 57% from last year.

FACES AND FIGURES

Shaquille O’Neal, 22, lobbying against trading for Danny Manning: “I’ve asked, and someone assured me it’s not going to happen. It was man-to-man, face-to-face, and I’d be disappointed if someone would look me in the face and said nothing was going to happen and it happens. The trade doesn’t make sense. We don’t need Manning. We already have 12 superstars on the team. We don’t need another. Too many superstars create too many ego problems.” . . . Actually, the Magic has one superstar, one blue-chip prospect (Anfernee Hardaway), one good player (Nick Anderson) and nine journeymen. Included is O’Neal’s buddy, Dennis Scott, who was in the Orlando offer to the Clippers. . . . Pooh Richardson, out because of a bruised calf and/or feelings as the Pacers climbed back into the playoff picture, has been told by Coach Larry Brown that his return is no longer his decision but a club decision. . . . The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot 40%: How slow was Derek Harper’s start in New York? Greg Anthony is expected to keep the starting job. Harper is averaging six points, three assists and shooting 35%. Anthony is shooting 38%. John Starks shot 38% for the first eight games this month, and the Knicks went 4-4. After a 20-point loss in New Jersey, Patrick Ewing said they were “playing like wimps.”