For Seniors : Passion for Travel Keeps the Zest in Their Marriage

Virginia and Harry Wolff Jr. fell in love for all the right reasons. For him: It was her matzo balls. For her: his 1938 Ford coupe. Fifty-five years later, they get up every morning and thank God they have each other. Says Harry: “We have one of the most beautiful lives there is.”

These two haven’t been documented on one of those television shows about the rich and famous. But if ever people are recognized for turning their life together into their own personal art, Harry and Virginia are definitely winners.

Ever since Harry, 82, was a young man in Chicago, he not only tried to live by the Ten Commandments but he also developed a few rules of his own. Number One: “Marriage is not a 50-50 proposition; it’s 100% or nothing.” After all these years, the Wolffs have more than an enduring marriage. They have a zesty friendship.

“We have a very smooth life together. We understand each other, read each other’s minds. We argue, sure, but we make up, too,” said Virginia.

Right now, Harry is mad at Virginia, 81, because she’s wearing thermals to bed. A few terribly inelegant moments pass as the question hangs in the air.

Then Virginia says: “Ask the question. Sex? It’s here.” She pointed to her head and Harry finished her thought. “Yes,” he said, “we still have sex, but it’s more compassionate, loving, affectionate. We’re secure together.”

A long time ago Harry Wolff Jr. was anything but secure. It was 1932. His mother had died, the Depression had wiped out his father’s savings and Harry’s dream of becoming a great doctor would never become a reality. He quit school and went to work for a department store cleaning toilets, shining the brass plates on the fire hydrants outside and shoveling coal for a total of $100 a week.

“Nobody else would work at those jobs. But I wanted more out of life than the $14 a week the WPA was offering,” he said.

Six years later he bought himself a Ford 60 coupe and he was sent to Northwestern University by the owner of the department store, who saw a great deal of promise in the self-confident Harry. Harry had a habit of making suggestions that made sense and profits.

Life was going well for Harry when he met Virginia.

“I didn’t think we would marry,” said Virginia. “I was going with another boy.” But Harry knew. “It was immediate love. We were married six weeks later. She made matzo balls with walnuts inside them just like my mother did.”

Opposites may attract but compatibility and the love of travel have kept the Wolffs together. In 1964, after the couple had been married 25 years and raised two sons, Harry, a successful wholesale business representative, suggested that they travel for three months. When they returned from their three-month Pacific voyage, he sold his business and they became world travelers.

They’ve been to all 50 states, sailed aboard 33 cruise ships and 17 freighters and visited every country in the world except India. It was when they traveled aboard freighters that they got into the habit of putting messages inside of bottles, corking them and throwing them overboard.

“In our 27 years of high-seas travel we have received 18 replies from our 225 bottles,” Harry said.

The Wolffs’ outings have included riding with four grandsons in a Goodyear blimp on Virginia’s 70th birthday, and spending 43 days on the longest train trip in the world, a 9,331-mile odyssey from London to Hong Kong.

Their home in Century City is a miniature museum of relics from their trips. They also have a collection of autographed photographs and personal letters from world leaders.

Harry has some rules about traveling: Do what comes natural--don’t live like a bum if you come from a fine home. No matter where you are in the world enjoy a cocktail hour. But perhaps his most important rule comes from his coal-shoveling days. If you use soft coal you get a sluggish fire, so only put the best food in your stomach.

In their spare time, they write letters to famous people and keep a travel journal, which they would like to publish. Meantime, Virginia is scanning the travel magazines planning their next adventure.