No-Bussing Memo Inflames Passions : Education: High school’s efforts to curb public displays of affection rub students the wrong way.
It is often waxed poetic that in the spring, young people’s fancy turns to love. Or something like that.
At Mission Viejo High School, l’amour has apparently blossomed so much that administrators felt it necessary to nip some of it in the bud.
On May 12, Dean of Students Toby Thurlow issued a memo to faculty and campus supervisors in an effort to splash cold water, so to speak, on what he termed “affectionate couples.”
“Along with several other concerned faculty members, I continue to see more and more couples hanging on each other in an inappropriate manner,” Thurlow wrote. “The touching, feeling, fondling, kissing, etc. is not to be condoned on campus.”
Some students are indignant over the policy.
After all, they said, a kiss is just a kiss.
But as far as school officials are concerned, it is grounds for detention--and possible suspension.
Get caught once, according to the memo, shame on the students.
Twice and they get after-school detention or Saturday school and their parents will be notified.
Three times and they’re suspended.
Yet administrators insist that punitive measures will not go as far as suspension.
The memo, Thurlow said Tuesday, is only meant to warn the amorous students to behave themselves.
“We just want to let them know that there is a time and a place for everything, and school is not that time and place,” he said.
Several students attacked the memo as unfair.
“It’s not right that they can dictate our actions,” Jess Carlucci, 16, said during lunch break Tuesday.
Just minutes before, Jess and his girlfriend, 14-year-old Alia Tirnanic, were embracing under a tree, sharing several long kisses. “This doesn’t affect our education,” he said.
Many of the students said they were not aware of Thurlow’s memo. Others said it has been a topic of debate and discussion in class.
“I heard that we should stay about 18 inches apart,” Alia said defiantly, with Thurlow hovering within earshot. “I heard that we can’t hug, that we can’t kiss.”
Not true about the 18-inch proximity, Thurlow replied.
“Well then, the picture that everyone got is that you can’t so much as stand near somebody,” Jess told Thurlow.
Neither Thurlow nor school Principal Duffy Clark would go into detail about what is considered “inappropriate manner.”
“Is it holding hands? No,” Thurlow said by way of example. “Is it someone kissing someone goodby? No. Kids--and teachers--do know what’s inappropriate and what should not be done at school. We don’t need to tell them that.”
Many other schools have similar regulations about inappropriate behavior among students, school officials said.
And as in the one at Mission Viejo High, these policies are general in scope and do not specifically spell out what is forbidden behavior.
“There are no hard rules targeting what’s considered inappropriate exhibitions in public,” said Alan Trudell, spokesman for the Garden Grove Unified School District. “We let the good judgment and common sense of the teachers prevail.”
Some Mission Viejo High students said they understand why such a policy would be implemented.
“I’ve seen some couples who have really gone at it,” said senior Todd Himes, 18. “Some of it is indeed outrageous.”
But such actions have been few, students said, and they should not restrict other students from being affectionate with their love interests.
“A hug and a kiss and we could get in trouble for that? It’s the dumbest move I’ve ever heard,” Todd said.
Joe Ollar and his girlfriend, Tracie Shueler, both 16, agree.
“It’s not like we’re fondling each other,” said Joe, both of his arms draped around Tracie.
“If our parents don’t care,” Tracie said, “why should the school?”
More to Read
Sign up for Essential California
The most important California stories and recommendations in your inbox every morning.
You may occasionally receive promotional content from the Los Angeles Times.