L.A. Speak : Kinko’s Lingo

copy god/goddess n . employee who knows how to operate every piece of equipment in the store. syn. kinkomniscient.

glue position n . employee’s assigned workstation. “Get to your glue position .”

kinkoid n . compleat Kinko’s employee; often despairs at meager social life. “My fellow kinkoid and I were going to go to the Viper Room, but the color copier went down in the middle of a job.”

kinkcest n . when kinkoids date.

kinkoagulation n. too many kinkoids in any given area at a given time.

kinkoblivion n . “Order? What order?”

kinkosham n . when customer places a large order and doesn’t pick it up.

line 8 n . code for a pretty woman customer. A typical Kinko’s only has six telephone lines. “Yo, Christopher, phone call on line 8 .”