Author Rodman Gives Old Team a Real Tattooing

Dennis Rodman has written his autobiography, called “Bad As I Wanna Be,” a title that ought to surprise no one. Rodman poses nude on a motorcycle on the cover, strategically holding a basketball.

Anyway, Rodman’s book devotes a full chapter to Madonna and also delves into such topics as sex, race and painted fingernails, even basketball.

Rodman’s former employers, the San Antonio Spurs, don’t get let off easily, especially in light of their dramatic flameout last season at the hands (fingernails unpainted) of the Houston Rockets.

“You can blame me . . . but where was Sean Elliott?” Rodman said in his book. “Did he ever stop Clyde Drexler?

“Where was David Robinson? They might be more of a basketball team if [Robinson] didn’t freeze up every time they play a big game. I got sold out by the players, the coaches, the management. They said [Will Perdue] fit in better . . . because he’s more of a family man. And that’s all they want down there in that white conservative city.”

Darn those conservatives.

Trivia time: When was the only time the Lakers were swept in a first-round playoff series?

Broadway drama: Mike Lupica in the New York Daily News, on the Knicks’ chances against the Bulls:

“They go into Chicago with a sweep. But really they go all the way back to the beginning, to the first second-round series against [Michael] Jordan, in [Pat] Riley’s first year. Only the Knicks believed they had a chance in that series, which ended up going seven unforgettable games. Only the Knicks believe they have a chance now against 72-10.

“Only the Knicks believe they are still the toughest out against Michael Jordan.”

Six-shooters: For what it’s worth, Gerald Williams became only the second Yankee player to get six hits in a game in Wednesday night’s 15-inning victory over the Yankees. The other? Myril Hoag in 1934.

Holding that Tiger: When Cecil Fielder struck out three times against Roger Clemens, it put him at one for 38 lifetime against Clemens with 19 strikeouts. But Fielder remained confident.

Said Fielder: “He knows if he gives me something to hit I’ll smash it.”

Said Clemens: “I was just glad one of my pitches didn’t hit his bat.”

Some hockey, eh? Toronto Star columnist Bob McKenzie isn’t lamenting the absence of Canadian teams in the NHL playoffs.

“Any time is a good time to wave the flag--the subversive American elements of the game should be kept in check at all times--but a choice between superficial patriotism or watching good hockey at this time of the year is a complete no-brainer, even for a puckhead.”

Trivia answer: In 1967 by the San Francisco Warriors.

And finally: Philadelphia Phillie pitcher Dave Leiper hit the first batting practice home run of his eight-year career, so he had absolutely no trouble putting the event in proper perspective.

Said Leiper: “My marriage, the birth of my children, my first day in the big leagues, they all pale in comparison to this.”