This Lineup More Nacho Than Macho

The Wisconsin Milk Marketing Board has its own version of the Green Bay Packers’ lineup, which it says describes them in cheese terms.

Among those in the lineup are defensive end Cheddar (Reggie White), quarterback Provolone (Brett Favre), kick returner Brie (Desmond Howard), tight end Gouda (Mark Chmura), running back Baby Swiss (Edgar Bennett) and strong safety Parmesan (LeRoy Butler).

If there is a Limburger on the team, stay away from him.

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Trivia time: How many schools in all three men’s NCAA basketball divisions are nicknamed Trojans and Bruins, other than USC and UCLA?

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Brotherly love: Asked to name his first childhood sports memory, University of Arizona guard Jason Lee’s answer was, “Hitting my brother with a baseball bat.”

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An Al Davis coup? Art Spander of the Oakland Tribune suggests that the Raiders, searching for a coach, should hire former 49er coach George Seifert.

“The billboards could go something like this: ‘Want to see the NFL coach with the top all-time winning percentage in action? Cross over the [Bay] Bridge.’ ”

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Gloom and doom: Glenn Dickey of the San Francisco Chronicle was opposed to the promoting of assistant football coach Tom Holmoe to the head position at California and has some dire predictions for the future:

“What is most likely is that Cal will fall back into a morass of mediocrity, playing again before sparse crowds, and that Holmoe will have to be paid off long before that five-year contract expires.”

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Incomparable: Gene Collier of the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette paid tribute to Dodger owner Peter O’Malley and his late father, Walter, and their contributions to baseball with this observation:

“Why even today, 35 years after it opened, Dodger Stadium remains the single most beautiful setting for the game on the planet.”

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Journalism lesson: LaPhonso Ellis of the Denver Nuggets to reporters after another ugly loss: “I can’t believe you are in [the locker room]. You could just pull out your previous articles.”

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Fashion outcasts: The San Jose Mercury News polled its readers recently, and one of the questions asked was which team had the ugliest logo and uniforms in the NHL.

The Phoenix Coyotes and New York Islanders tied for that dubious honor.

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Trivia answer: Arkansas Little Rock, Mount Olive, N.C.; Troy State, Ala., and Virginia State are nicknamed Trojans. There are officially no other Bruins, although the Brown Bears sometimes are called that.

By the way, Division III Williams is called the Ephs. If any readers know what that means, please write.

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And finally: Tommy John pitched 26 seasons, including 14 after the historic ligament transplant in his pitching elbow, a procedure that became known as “Tommy John surgery.”

John told Dave van Dyck of the Chicago Sun-Times, “It’s better to have an orthopedic procedure named after you than a proctological surgery. ‘Tommy John hemorrhoid surgery’ doesn’t sound quite as good as ‘Tommy John elbow surgery.’ ”