Man’s Best Friend Became a Suspect

Several suspicious residents told police they had seen “a man wearing a mask in a parked car,” a South Pasadena newspaper reported. Officers tracked down the suspect, who turned out to be a large dog--unarmed.

WHAT TO WEAR, WHAT TO WEAR . . . : A weather report that appeared in a Ventura newspaper a few years ago forecast some wild extremes (see accompanying).

NUTS TO ALL THAT: Misinterpreting a city ordinance that prohibited the throwing of objects at sporting events, Dodgers management benched peanut tosser extraordinaire Roger Owens a few years ago. Reinstated later, partly at the urging of then-Mayor Tom Bradley’s wife, Ethel, the popular vendor said of his two-week throwing ban: “It was sad to see the fans holding their hands out.”

TYPICAL ANGELENO CHECKLIST: Eleanor Van Natta found a list lying in the street that contained a list of things to do (see accompanying). I tried to find the owner but the problem was, it could have belonged to innumerable local residents.

STUPID CRIMINAL TRICKS: A thief grabbed two dozen T-shirts from a table on the steps of City Hall and took off running. Five men quickly chased him down.

“He was astonished to find out they were off-duty police officers,” said a witness.

The culprit hadn’t noticed that the T-shirts bore a photo of then Chief Daryl Gates and the words, “Citizens in Support of the Chief of Police.”

GIVE ME THOSE CAR KEYS! A bumper sticker in Hermosa Beach, home of especially zealous parking cops, said: “Friends Don’t Let Friends Park in Hermosa Beach.”

THOSE WERE THE DAYS: The big problem in schools in 1912, according to a local newspaper story, was the “unsanitary and unhealthful” practice of . . .

Gum chewing.

DUMBEST 911 CALL OF ALL TIME: A woman called from a hospital to complain that she couldn’t get a nurse to bring her ice.

BOBBY SOX AND ALL: When an aftershock from the 1994 Northridge quake rumbled through Ed Debevic’s 1950s-style diner in Beverly Hills, a waitress wearing period garb yelled, “God, I don’t wanna die dressed this way!”

ART ALERT: Smog art at a UC Riverside exhibition included 17 corked bottles containing pieces of gauze that had been exposed to polluted air. “You can remove the cork from a bottle and smell something really nauseous,” guaranteed a helpful museum spokesman.

BE TRUE TO YOUR ASSIGNMENT TOO: As a student at Hawthorne High, Beach Boy Brian Wilson got into hot water for submitting his song “Surfin’ ” for an assignment in music composition. He received an F for the song that later became a bestseller. Contrary to rumor, he did not fail the course, but managed a C.

miscelLAny:

A drink invented in L.A. in 1926 is said to have acquired its name because customers would often say to owner Julius Freed, “Give me an orange, Julius.” (No, we don’t mean Delaware Punch.)