For 7 Siblings Separated by WWII, Decades Fade as New Memories Are Made at Reunion

FOOTHILL RANCH —  They arrived here from Dallas and Baltimore, Endicott, N.Y., and Limburg, Holland. And when they gathered at John Wayne Airport, all they could do was stare at one another.

It was understandable. For the first time in 52 years, or since the end of World War II, all seven Buikstra siblings were together again. The youngest is 55, the oldest 76. “Well, we’ve all gotten older,” said Anna Buikstra Helisek, 65, the third-youngest. “And the boys [brothers] kept some of this a secret from us girls. The girls were the last ones to get here.”

And when they got here, the sisters couldn’t get over the thought of seeing one another again after all those years.

“See, we didn’t know for sure that the two brothers were going to be here from Holland until we got to the airport, and all the boys were standing there smiling,” Helisek said.

But the smiles soon gave way to tears.

“Happy tears, of course,” Helisek said. “Just very happy to be together.”

The family has kept in touch throughout the years with letters and phone calls, as well as occasional one-on-one visits. But because of the geographical distance between siblings, as well as financial considerations, they were not able to gather as a family until now, when a wedding brought them together.

Frans Buikstra, 60, of Foothill Ranch, is the second-youngest sibling, and he and his wife, Susanna, had invited the other Buikstras to the wedding of their only child, Jennifer. The wedding took place last Saturday at St. Kilian’s Church in Mission Viejo.

Throughout the years, Frans Buikstra said, his brothers and sisters had worried they would run out of time before getting together.

“We are growing older very quickly, and time is passing us by,” he said. “I just wish my parents had been alive to see all of us together again. It would have made them so happy.”

Two of the brothers, Ben Buikstra, who is the eldest, and Herman Buikstra, the youngest, have remained in Holland all their lives and speak mostly Dutch. The other brother, Jan Buikstra, 71, and sisters Yellie Buikstra Dumbrowski, 73, and Tinie Buikstra Van Halen, 70, have lived in the United States for most of their adult lives.

Dumbrowski became a war bride at 22 and moved to the states with her American GI husband; Helisek immigrated to the United States at 15 when war broke out and wound up living with a childless couple she had earlier befriended. She lived with the family throughout high school.

“I couldn’t wait to get to the States and see all of the exciting things there,” Helisek said. “If it hadn’t been for the war, I never would have gone, though. But we were a working-class family, and if you did not have money, there were no opportunities or education.”

For Frans Buikstra, it was an unlikely encounter with actress Jayne Mansfield that brought him here to live.

“I was in the Air Force in Holland, and sometimes, the guys from the U.S. troops would show me pictures of places in the States,” he said. “I was attracted to everything they told me about California, especially the weather.

“But one year during the holidays, we were told that we were going to get a visit from Jayne Mansfield. When I finally saw her, I just went, ‘Holy mackerel!’ ” he said. “I decided right then and there that if that’s what women from the States looked like, then sign me up.”

Gradually, the other siblings immigrated here after meeting future spouses, with the exception of the two brothers who remained in Holland.

They say they can never forget their childhood during World War II, when life was a struggle and everything was rationed.

“I remember when Herman, the baby of the family, was born,” Helisek said. “It was in the middle of a snowstorm, and there was also a bomb scare at the time. Herman was born by candlelight. . . . Our father had pedaled his bike to the doctor’s home to tell him that our mother was ready to deliver.”

Frans Buikstra remembers that chocolate was a rarity. As were flowers or anything else that was considered a luxury in those days.

“We would get one piece of candy at Christmas,” he said. “That was really quite a treat, and we sure looked forward to it. And I remember one year, when we were kids, that we were wishing so much that we could get our mother some flowers for Mother’s Day. Well, somehow, Jan came home with flowers for our mother. He always managed to do things like that.”

“He ‘borrowed’ them,” Frans Buikstra said, laughing as he winked at his brother.

Among the brothers and sisters, they have seven children, five grandchildren and one great-grandchild. Their parents have passed away; their father at 85 in 1985, their mother at 95 in 1991.

The siblings’ long-awaited visit has been bittersweet.

“We’re savoring every minute of it because--let’s be realistic--this is probably the last time we will all be able to be together,” Helisek said.

But they aren’t dwelling on that.

Instead, they have spent this time doing the simple things they have longed to share: looking at photos, reminiscing, sipping coffee, hugging. They even took a quick trip to Las Vegas.

And now, after about a week of catching up on one another’s lives, everyone is heading home.

But they are all giving thanks for the same thing: one another.

“Forget what we missed out on in the past,” Frans Buikstra said. “Those things are gone forever. But we’re making new memories. How very lucky we are that we didn’t wait until it was too late.”