Tails, You Choose

Mr. Potato Head on the back of a quarter? Or the Nike swoosh? Or the Golden Gate Bridge?

These are a few of the ideas--silly and serious--being batted around as Congress finalizes a proposal to let every state put its own artwork on the reverse side of America’s most used coin.

Starting in 1999, George Washington and his silver pigtail would head a series of redesigned tails. Five new coins would be minted each year for nationwide use, honoring states in the order they were admitted to the union California, the 31st state, would be commemorated in 2005. In 2009, the American eagle would return. Not surprisingly, the plan has inspired some wild imaginings.

In Illinois, the Chicago Tribune suggested chiseling Michael Jordan onto its 25-cent piece. The San Francisco Chronicle urged a Californiabas-relief of “a motorist beating a bicyclist todeath with a stuffed spotted owl.” And New Jersey residents have floated such ideas as a tollbooth, Thomas Edison with a lightbulb and the slogan “Washington slept here.”

The federal government, meanwhile, has another vision--an estimated $1 billion savings from coin collectors and schoolkids keeping the 50-state sets as souvenirs.

That could be overly optimistic. Treasury Department rules forbid anything truly catchy: no living people, no busts of dead celebrities (to prevent two-headed coins) and nothing “frivolous.”

So we consulted our own panel of pseudo experts and told them to ignore the guidelines.

First, our suggestions for several other states. Arizona: two governors in handcuffs (Evan Mecham and Fife Symington). Nevada: just a simple inscription, “Kiss this goodbye.” Hawaii: Jack Lord, a.k.a. Steve McGarrett of “Hawaii Five-0.” Wisconsin: a hunk of Tillamook with the state’s unofficial motto, “Eat cheese or die.” Idaho: Mr. Potato Head.

For more serious musings, Newsweek columnist George Will recently offered such intriguing advice as: Huck Finn for Missouri (“lighting out for the territories and away from the boneheads who today want to censor him”), artist Georgia O’Keefe for New Mexico, Mt. Rushmore for South Dakota (“an agreeable example of American excess”), pitcher Nolan Ryan for Texas (he “played baseball like a gunslinger”) and Pearl Harbor’s U.S.S. Arizona for Hawaii (“lest we forget”).

He also suggested that Vermont’s coin be engraved with native son Calvin Coolidge, who “presided over a 45% increase in America’s ice cream production”--and that Oregon choose a shoe logo: “The symbol of Beaverton’s Nike corporation is everywhere else, so the swoosh might as well be on the quarter.”

For California, Will nominated William Mulholland. “Forget the movie ‘Chinatown,’ ” he wrote. “Honor the man who brought water to Southern California.”

No way. Well, maybe if Mulholland is wearing Ray-Bans.

Fortunately, Will isn’t the only luminary with a two-bit idea for the Golden State’s quarter. Here’s what others are saying:

* Mayor Richard Riordan: “We should do something that shows we have the sunniest disposition and the best sense of humor. It could be a person on rollerblades or Bugs Bunny . . . or a mayor begging at the feet of the governor for more state money.”

* Liza Lou, artist: “If it’s going to represent California, maybe it should just look like a hubcap.”

* Ken Norton Jr., San Francisco 49ers: “California has so much to offer, we might have to increase the size of the quarter. I would design it with the sun shining down on the mountains, the Hollywood sign on the mountaintop and the coastline just below.”

* Holly and Michael Sharp, GirlStar clothing designers: “Palm trees, surfboards and girls in bikinis.”

* Former Gov. Jerry Brown: “The bear and star from California’s flag.”

* Joel Fox, Howard Jarvis Taxpayers Assn.: “A gold miner picking up a silicon chip. That covers the state’s history from beginning to present.”

* Gov. Pete Wilson: The state flag.

* David Lubars, BBDO ad agency: Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys.

* Richard Jeni, comedian: “I hope this time they go with the fat Elvis. I also hear they’re changing the back of the $1,000 bill to say, ‘Redeemable for a night in the Lincoln bedroom.’ ”

* Cardinal Roger Mahony: Father Junipero Serra, founder of California’s missions.

* CCH Pounder, actress on “ER”: A hummingbird.

* Kevin Starr, historian and state librarian: “The famous Monterey cypress at Pebble Beach. My second choice would be Groucho Marx, because he expresses the irrepressible wit and whimsy of the Golden State.”

* Steve Moore, cartoonist: “Let’s replace the eagle with another bird, the kind of bird associated with road rage. That’ll make things more convenient on the freeways because if somebody cuts you off, all you have to do is flip ‘em a quarter.”

Mercifully, nobody on our panel suggested Mickey Mouse. But we did hear some other goofy ideas: the O.J. Simpson defense team; a fault line; Prozac next to a plastic surgeon’s scalpel; Angelyne, the big-breasted billboard babe; a smiley face and the state’s unofficial mantra, “Have a nice day”; a bull’s-eye (to symbolize drive-by shootings); and a montage of California’s four seasons--fire, mudslide, earthquake and riot.

There were some serious recommendations too: a portrait of labor leader Cesar Chavez, the California quail (the state bird), Yosemite, a movie camera, author Joan Didion, the California poppy and the late Earl Warren, former governor and U.S. Supreme Court justice.

“It’s going to be interesting to see how each state [wrestles with] the question of ‘What is the one image that we all agree represents us?’ ” says coin historian Alan M. Stahl, of the American Numismatic Society. When Canada tried a similar program in 1992, “they used animals because that’s all anyone could agree on.”

Under the legislation before Congress, the method by which states pick their artwork isn’t specified. But the images would be subject to approval by the Federal Fine Arts Commission, the Citizens Commemorative Coin Advisory Commission and the Treasury secretary.

The bill has already cleared the House, on a 413-6 vote, and is expected to win Senate OK in a few weeks. The sponsor, Republican Rep. Michael N. Castle of Delaware, says the plan would be fun, educational--and profitable. Because the government pays just 4 cents to manufacture each quarter, every coin taken out of circulation by collectors shaves 21 cents off the amount of money that the Treasury would otherwise have to borrow to back up the coin’s face value. That, in turn, reduces interest payments on the national debt.

In this case, Congress predicts a savings of $1 billion over 10 years. But an awful lot of quarters--15.4 billion--would have to be squirreled away for that to happen.

No problem, Castle insists: The last time the 25-cent piece was altered--for the bicentennial in 1976--collectors hung onto 80% of the 1.7 billion coins minted.

Still, not everyone believes the state quarters will be as popular. “We could see a lot of dull designs,” says John Kleeberg, curator of modern coins for the American Numismatic Society.

Stahl’s guess is that most states will settle on birds or flowers. “I don’t think you can choose just one dead person or one building anymore,” he says. “If you do, someone is bound to feel offended or left out.”

Which brings us to our final proposal for the Golden State. It’s sort of a California Zen thing: Leave the back of the quarter blank.

* Zan Dubin, Deidre Spelliscy Gifford, Jeannine Stein, Janet Cromley, Susanna Timmons, D. James Romero, Deirdre McCormack Hill and Ann Harrison contributed to this story.