She’s Searching for What Is Hers

Dear Cynthia: I am on a New York City street trying to grill my steak. There are a lot of grills, but none of them is mine. I keep placing my steak on other people’s grills to heat it up. I see a rat run by.

Then I am on a plane, and someone is sitting in my seat. I ask him where his seat is, and he shows me all the way to the very back of the plane. I sit down--and start eating my steak!

CRISTINA

Los Angeles

Dear Reader: None of the grills is yours and someone else is in your seat! Your dream raises issues of what is yours and what you have a right to.

Meat is a mainstay of nutrition, the main course. To cook your steak, you have to depend on others. Getting to the meat of the issue here, you are very busy, going from grill to grill, then flying on a plane. Perhaps your dream is telling you that to get what you need and what is coming to you, you better get out of the rat race (remember what you saw run by?). You better get far (“all the way to the very back”) from the hustle and bustle represented by New York City.

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Dear Cynthia: My dreams are about going up in an elevator. In one, the elevator was very rickety and the door kept swinging open. In another, the floor dropped as I ascended and I had to hold on to a bar across my waist. Another elevator ascended unattached from the building, as if lost in space.

What do these dreams mean?

DANA

Pasadena

Dear Reader: Elevator dreams often refer to our rise and fall in status, financial security, awareness . . . big areas of life that can be influenced by outside events. The good news for you is that you are always going up!

In the case of the rickety elevator, perhaps you feel the company you are employed by is shaky, or your position in it is not secure. Rumors of downsizing or a merger could have inspired this dream. But the second dream was a message that even if the bottom falls out--if your security or foundation disappears altogether--you should be safe; there is a safety bar for you to hold on to.

Apparently you have a good severance package. And in the third dream, the one of space travel by elevator, the sky is the limit! This dream indicates a feeling that you can achieve whatever you want and are not limited by the constraints of company structure.

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Dear Cynthia: I’m 32 years old, and for as long as I can remember I have had the same dream about once a month. I am riding my motorcycle along the edge of a very deep but beautiful canyon. I am not panicked at all, just enjoying the ride. But then for no reason I suddenly go off the cliff! I wake up before I crash at the bottom.

I hope you can shed some light on this. Thank you.

CHARLIE HOBBS

Garden Grove

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Dear Reader: Apparently you enjoy living on the edge! What would be frightening to most people doesn’t seem to faze you. In fact, you appreciate the beauty of it.

Understanding the contrast between both sides of any situation can give one a sense of balance and confidence. Many people are too afraid to take risks, even for things that would help them get what they really want from life. You are not afraid. Indeed, even when something goes wrong, you survive. This indicates to me that when something doesn’t go as planned, you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, figure out what you can learn from the experience and move on.

Of course, if you are addicted to risk and high drama, you may get bored easily, require constant change, have trouble committing to a relationship, grow dissatisfied with a job, etc. But your dream indicates that you can find the balance required for a satisfying life.

Behavioral therapist Cynthia Richmond’s column appears every other Monday. To contact her, write to In Your Dreams, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053; send a fax to (213) 237-0732; or e-mail her at cynthrich@aol.com Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. Letters should be no longer than 100 words and cannot be returned.

In Your Dreams should be read for entertainment purposes only.

Cynthia Richmond explains children’s dreams on our Kids’ Reading Room page every Wednesday.