Viagra Users Not Looking Before Leaping
Men, let’s say you haven’t had sex in about seven years. OK, that’s a bit extreme--let’s say three days. It seems your “equipment” isn’t up to the task.
And instead of hearing that cuddly, misty-eyed therapist Robin Williams plays in the movies whispering, “It’s not your fault,” there’s this fire-breathing Godzilla-like voice in your head screeching, “IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT! IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!”
Then a friendly pharmaceutical company comes along with a magic blue pill that promises to transform you into the man of steel--with or without the funny leotard. Schwwwwing! Houston, we don’t have a problem.
But wait--Houston, we might have a problem after all. The world’s largest organization of eye doctors said earlier this month that the magic pill--Viagra--could cast a bluish tinge to the vision of users for up to five hours after each dose.
Naturally deflated, you return to the fine print on the magic-pill box that you originally paid as much attention to as the gibberish inside a Hallmark card. The box clearly states in black and white with a blue tinge that--though very unlikely--the pill could also give you headaches, dizzy spells, indigestion and diarrhea.
Do you and the estimated 300,000 other Viagra pill poppers stop popping?
Apparently, the answer is a resounding no. A week after the American Academy of Ophthalmology cautioned users about potential eye difficulties, the “Pfizer Riser” juggernaut continues unabated.
“There’s been no slowdown in patients wanting prescriptions,” said Dr. Jacob Rajfer, a UCLA urologist who helped with the clinical trials of Viagra. “I’ve written several hundred prescriptions so far, and I haven’t heard one complaint.”
Well, just what side effects would it take to halt the Viagra stampede?
After an unscientific survey of local psychologists, experts in male sexual dysfunction and the few Viagra users brave enough to talk, the query into the very essence of man was answered this way.
Would men throw away their Viagra if it caused tooth decay?
No.
If it caused hair loss?
No.
If it caused horns to sprout from their heads?
No.
If it caused asteroids to smash into Earth, devastating cities but not theirs?
No.
Perhaps best summing up this view of man’s special relationship with himself, one Westside psychologist said there’s only one side effect that would scare men off Viagra--death.
“Look at how many men play Russian roulette with their lives already for sex,” said psychologist Rex Julian Beaber, who is also a practicing attorney. “There’s life-threatening infectious diseases out there, and many don’t stop to put on a condom.
“Let’s get real here. We live in a culture where people wear handcuffs and whip each other. Anyone who thinks that a few little side effects is going to stop men from seeking pleasure should have their head examined.”
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That men will go to such extremes to cling to their virility isn’t terribly surprising. Physically, it can mean sexual satisfaction to the man and his partner. Psychologically, it can buoy an often fragile ego that must survive a torrent of societal images that repeats that sex is power and perpetual youth.
Ironically, on its deepest levels, the reason some men would risk their lives for sexual potency is that a loss of it is considered tantamount to death.
“What’s the point if I can’t have sex anymore?” asked a 32-year-old computer programmer from Newport Beach who has found a new lease on life with Viagra. (Like most of the Viagra users in this story, he requested anonymity.)
Despite this rather stark view of male sexuality, there’s plenty of evidence that men won’t do absolutely anything to get an erection. Before the ease and convenience of Viagra, which entails merely swallowing a pill an hour before sex, treatments for erectile dysfunction really smarted.
The previous “cures” called for either an injection at the base of the penis or inserting a plunger into the urinary tract to obtain the desired reaction. Talk about side effects. That men would even endure the often painful intrusions is testament to the anguish that impotent men can suffer.
“Let me tell you about those needle jobs,” said Raymond Adamowicz, 75, a retired investor from Downey and currently a satisfied Viagra user. “Yeeehoooo. Those things were horrible. Just horrible. I didn’t do that for long.”
Others argue that men may be courting trouble or tempting fate when they take medication to rejuvenate their flagging sex lives, particularly older men. Far from anything to be ashamed of, a loss of sexual ability is a perfectly natural part of aging.
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In fact, the process may prepare men for the “next better world,” said Bill Maher, host of ABC’s “Politically Incorrect.” Maybe an older man should have “something more contemplative on [his] mind than [his] next erection,” Maher said on a recent broadcast.
“Ha. Wait till he has [erectile] trouble,” said one 63-year-old Viagra user from Manhattan Beach, “if he doesn’t have it already.”
Another Viagra user, who hadn’t had sex in five years before taking the pill, points out that the benefits of regaining sexual ability go way beyond the bedroom.
“It’s changed how I see the world. I have a much more positive outlook now than I did before,” said the 70-year-old retired Los Angeles businessman. “And my wife seems very pleased as well.”
And who knows what the side effects of the pill might be on U.S. history? Will Viagra congressmen be more or less likely to chase administrative assistants around the copier? Will a Viagra-taking president be more or less likely to let the missiles fly?
Indeed, it boggles the mind to think of Viagra inside the Oval Office. President Clinton is in enough trouble without the boost of Viagra.
But then, would Clinton even be in the Oval Office if Viagra had been available during the 1996 presidential campaign? What if Bob Dole--who recently revealed he was a Viagra test subject--found that the drug enhanced his performance at the polls as well?
We can only speculate on such matters.
But for now, the side-effects question rests with the men, although it could soon face women as well. Of course, women have coped with the sometimes serious consequences of birth control pills for decades, but tests are now underway to determine a woman’s reaction to Viagra.
Researchers believe it may enhance a woman’s ability to achieve an orgasm.
“In terms of blood circulation, the genitals of a man and a woman are very similar,” said Dr. Jaroslav Marik, head of the Tyler Medical Clinic in Westwood. “I believe we will see women dealing with these same questions very soon.”
