Tears for a Fallen Protector

Thomas O. Wall had a heart so big, so packed with love and goodness, that it propelled him happily and equally through his three treasured worlds: family, church, job.

Tuesday, the three fused into one quiet, grieving world, as friends, relatives and colleagues gathered at the Orange County Fire Authority captain’s east Tustin home and struggled with the news of his death. While fighting one of several brush fires in Riverside County late Monday, Wall, 44, started feeling ill; he went into cardiac arrest on the front lawn of a house he had been trying to save. He died later at a hospital.

“This is the saddest day of my career in the fire service,” said Fire Chief Charles “Chip” Prather, choking back tears as he stood before a crowd of solemn firefighters Tuesday. “To lose [Wall] is beyond my capacity to express. This department will be in pain for quite some time.”

Wall’s death comes less than a month after another firefighter, Allen Donelan, 34, died suddenly while recuperating from back surgery at a hospital in Orange. An autopsy revealed advanced heart disease as the cause of death. Donelan worked with Wall in a four-man crew at Station 21 in Tustin and was among his closest friends.

It was Wall who organized Donelan’s funeral, complete with a procession of fire engines and a flyover by firefighting helicopters, that took place in Tustin two weeks ago. During the cortege, he walked with Donelan’s widow, Cara, and was “a pillar of support” for the department in the days that followed, Prather said.

“Tom was still mourning, still grieving over the loss of his friend, and yet he pushed on for the sake of everyone else,” he said. “He died courageously and unselfishly. He was a hero and he deserves to be remembered that way.”

His widow and three children remembered him Tuesday as a goofy, fun-loving father who strummed bluegrass songs on his guitar at home, always available for a hug and ready with a new joke.

“He was the best,” said his daughter, Megan, who turned 18 on Tuesday. “He never got mad. He always showed us love.”

And bravery, said Joel Wall, 15, who recalled a summer day last year when his father, who had been off duty and planted in front of the television, scrambled through the window of a neighbor’s burning house and started fighting the fire alone with a garden hose.

Wall received the department’s Courage Under Fire Award for his swift response, which kept the fire from spreading until fire crews arrived.

“That’s when I knew my dad was the bravest man on Earth,” Joel said. He clutched his sister’s hand. “He didn’t even think about it. He just did it. That’s the way he was.”

Wall had recently started practicing a special song he planned to play for his wife, Chris, on their 25th wedding anniversary next summer, a day he was already “just gushing over,” said Lee Scott, a friend and fellow guitarist. He’d rehearse the chords as often as he could--in the family room, the garage or the fellowship hall at church--only to shush himself the moment Chris walked in.

I can’t swear that I’ll be here for the rest of your life, but I’ll be here for the rest of mine.

“He wanted it to be a surprise for her and he wanted it to be perfect,” Scott said. “That’s the thing about Tom. He was never afraid to tell people how he felt, especially when it came to his wife. He used to say he could almost hear her wings.”

To members of Canyon Church in Anaheim Hills, Wall was a deeply spiritual friend, a formidable, burly sort of guy who melted like butter around babies.

“He was a walking, breathing blessing to everybody,” said church member Norman Brock. “Anybody, I mean anybody, came before Tom.”

And, for as long as anyone can remember, Wall was “the rock” for his fellow firefighters. He guided them as their captain through loss and pain and everyday job worries, and walked with them as a friend through personal triumphs and defeats.

“He was the most affable, caring person I’ve ever known,” said Capt. Scott Brown, a department spokesman and friend of Wall’s. “He was emotional and kind, and you knew--he made you know--that he’d do anything in the world for you.”