Bruin Tailgate Party Will Be Easy to Find
And now the wisecracks about the Westwood scandal begin. Parking will be a “nightmare” in Pasadena today for the women’s World Cup soccer final, KNX sportscaster Chuck Madden warned, “unless you’re a UCLA football player.”
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EQUAL TIME: I had praised President Clinton’s decision to attend the World Cup match, while knowing that if the U.S. team lost, some critics would say it was because he had allowed American soccer secrets to be sold to the Chinese.
An anti-Clintonite from Morongo Valley replied that the president is really going to the game so he can solicit the Chinese for “campaign contributions for Al Gore.”
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CALIFORNIA, HERE WE GO: “I had heard that Northern California wanted to separate from Southern California,” Cynthia Smith writes, “and that the San Fernando Valley wanted to secede from the city of Los Angeles. I didn’t know that Los Angeles had trumped them both and pledged allegiance to Canada!” (see accompanying). With this weather, I thought L.A. had moved to Florida.
Her note recalls the time that Jack Kent Cooke, the owner of the L.A. Kings, admitted that he had mistakenly thought hockey would be a hit in this city because of all the Canadian emigres here. “Now I know why all those Canadians left Canada,” Cooke concluded. “They hate hockey.”
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ONLY IN L.A. COLUMNIST NOT LISTED: Penny Jennings of Santa Monica noticed that the Job Factory in Westwood claims links to some of the most “unusual jobs in the world” (see photo). True, stretch mark reader and dead fish plucker sound like not-so-standard vocations. But accountant? Of course, accountants can do unusual things with numbers, I guess.
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PARDON THEIR FRENCH: Carol Orendy found an ad in which “fleur de lis” had been spelled “flirtily” (see accompanying).
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VALLEY TALK: You’ll recall that I lamented the colorless marketing theme chosen by the leaders of the San Gabriel Valley: “We Have It All.” Readers shared my chagrin and contributed several slogans more suited to the region. They included:
* “A Perfect I-10,” Curt Nathan of Arcadia
* “Not That Valley,” Carrie P. of Pasadena
* “Come Blow Your Horn,” Joseph Mark Klein of Pacific Palisades (this is San GABRIEL, remember)
* “Not L.A. And Proud of It” Ellen Zunino of Monrovia (who also submitted, “Where L.A.’s Smog Comes to Die”).
And the winner, which I’m sure will be adopted by the San Gabriel Valley’s marketing group, was submitted by Linda Taubenreuther of Monrovia. It’s a phrase that can be read in a couple of ways: “The San Gabriel Valley: It’s Hot!”
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AIN’T THAT A POKE IN THE EYE? Well, the Dodger jinx has struck me. I said it was fitting that one of the Three Stooges--the late Larry Fine--was a big fan of the team. And, like a knucklehead, I identified him as Curly. Actually, he played Larry, as a dozen callers pointed out. Funny, all the callers were males.
miscelLAny:
Planning a trip overseas this summer? Here’s a warning that Jennings, today’s featured photographer, noticed: “If you look like your passport photo, you are definitely too ill to travel.”
Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.
