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A Kid Can Get With Green Monster

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When the Boston Red Sox hired Theo Epstein as general manager earlier this week, Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy shook his head in disbelief.

Epstein is only 28, making him the youngest general manager in baseball history.

“It sounds like a Bill Veeck stunt, like sending midget Eddie Gaedel up to the plate as a pinch-hitter,” Shaughnessy wrote. “Come to think of it, wasn’t there a movie like this -- little kid inherits Minnesota Twins from grandfather and makes himself manager?”

But Shaughnessy relented, noting that Epstein’s decisions probably won’t have much impact outside the baseball world.

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“When you come right down to it, this is only baseball. John F. Kennedy was 26 when the Japanese cut his boat in half in the Solomon Islands in 1943. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart wrote his first symphony when he was 8. Theo probably can make the call on Dustin Hermanson.”

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Trivia time: Who holds the record for most skins won in a single Skins Game?

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How ‘bout some humble pie? Annika Sorenstam won eight times on the LPGA Tour in 2001 and fellow tour player Karrie Webb said she would eat her hat should Sorenstam continue at such a torrid pace.

Steve Elling in the Orlando Sentinel offered some serving suggestions after Sorenstam won last weekend for her 11th title of 2002.

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“Gulp. What best complements a cotton chapeau, red or white wine? Care for an order of Vegemite with that, miss? Perhaps it’ll go down easier as a sandwich,” he wrote.

To which Webb responded: “I might have to add some salt and tomato sauce to it.”

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He’s no dope: Scott Ostler of the San Francisco Chronicle defends the NFL substance abuse policy, which mandates an automatic suspension for ephedra use, but no suspension for first-time marijuana users:

“[Ephedra] could give an unfair chemical advantage over an opponent,” Ostler writes. “If I’m playing football and my opponent wants to smoke pot before the game, I’ll bring him matches.”

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Expensive phone call: The Arizona Cardinals’ leading rusher, Thomas Jones, will miss the rest of the season after breaking his hand while answering the telephone at home.

The Cardinals put him on reserve/non-football injury and will not have to pay him for the remainder of the season. It will cost him about $135,000.

Presumably, Jones will invest in a hands-free headset before next season.

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Looking back: On this day in 1987, Bo Jackson rushed for 221 yards to lead the Los Angeles Raiders to a 37-14 rout of the Seattle Seahawks.

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Trivia answer: Greg Norman, who won all 18 in the 2001 Skins Game.

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And finally: Rick Morrissey of the Chicago Tribune doesn’t see much hope for USC making a BCS bowl no matter the outcome of today’s game.

“I’m thankful that, whatever happens against [USC] on Saturday night, Notre Dame will go to a BCS game, and USC probably won’t,” Morrissey wrote in his Thanksgiving Day column. “I’m pretty sure Trojan Coach Pete Carroll isn’t thankful that college football is better when Notre Dame matters.”

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-- Peter Yoon

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