THE TIMES’ RANKINGS

*--* No. School (Rec) Comment 1 OKLAHOMA (12-0) Rankman suggests a play-in game between USC and Louisiana State. 2 USC (10-1) Trojans line up to receive their stomping orders before Oregon State game. 3 LOUISIANA STATE (11-1) Tigers want mandatory steroid testing for all BCS computer operators. 4 MICHIGAN (10-2) Losses by USC and LSU might have Wolverines sucking on Sugar cubes. 5 TEXAS (10-2) Won’t get a BCS bid unless old pal Oklahoma takes care of Kansas State. 6 GEORGIA (10-2) Trojan fans rooting for win over LSU to put an end to BCS madness. 7 OHIO STATE (10-2) If BCS bowls keep losing interest, it could be back to Capital (square) One. 8 TENNESSEE (10-2) Volunteers’ at-large BCS picture no longer a fuzzy orange. 9 MIAMI (10-2) Big East says it will mail Hurricanes their last conference trophy. 10 FLORIDA STATE (10-2) Replay of Florida postgame fight to be shown on HBO’s boxing after dark. 11 PURDUE (9-3) Solich calls to warn Tiller that a 9-3 record can get a coach fired. 12 FLORIDA (8-4) Review of tape reveals ACC referees doing tomahawk chop before FSU game. 13 MIAMI (OHIO) (11-1) Local fast-food joint serving new “Roethlisberger” with fries and Coke. 14 WASHINGTON STATE (9-3) Team assures Holiday Bowl its coach is not leaving to coach Alabama. 15 KANSAS STATE (10-3) Mike Wallace tells Wildcats they’re only “60 Minutes” from Big 12 title. 16 MISSISSIPPI (9-3) As Eli said, Ole Miss picked the wrong year to go 7-1 in SEC. 17 TEXAS CHRISTIAN (11-1) Players must be thrilled going all the way to Fort Worth for a bowl game. 18 IOWA (9-3) Team looking forward to Insight Power Tool and Hay Feed Bowl. 19 NEBRASKA (9-3) Wanted: New head coach, must win every game every year. 20 BOISE STATE (11-1) Doing to the WAC what Brigham Young used to do in the WAC. 21 BOWLING GREEN (10-2) Rankman will be literally glued to TV for tonight’s MAC championship. 22 WEST VIRGINIA (8-4) Hey, look one ranking rung down and see your Gator Bowl opponent. 23 MARYLAND (9-3) Remember, Terps, no cutting in line at Orlando-based amusement parks. 24 MINNESOTA (9-3) Team kills time before bowl game by watching “Mary Tyler Moore” reruns. 25 PITTSBURGH (8-4) ESPN will create “Fitzgerald” award if receiver does not win Heisman.

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