UCLA goes to a pass-ive offense

WHAT A bore. Shoot, what a disappointment.

UCLA has all these seniors, a highly touted quarterback, a 20-0 lead and the Bruins go on to play as if they’re afraid to lose.

They get the kind of offensive play-calling that will get them knocked off in the Pacific 10 Conference later this season, and good for them -- they’ve beaten Stanford and Brigham Young, but if this is how they’re going to play it, forget any real lofty goals.

They have a new offensive coordinator in Jay Norvell, who couldn’t answer a question after the game until it had been asked twice, which makes you wonder how he ever gets a play into the game.

When I asked him if he had any part in that conservative, lackluster play for a morale-loss defeat to USC a year ago as a coach for Nebraska, he said, “I’m not going to respond to that.”

I’d be embarrassed too, but UCLA has its man -- if it only wants to get beat by a couple of touchdowns by USC this season.

Funny, he was far more aggressive when dodging questions than when calling plays for Ben Olson, which is odd, because you’d think someone escaping Nebraska would be more happy than testy.

Here at UCLA he has the former No. 1 recruit in the nation in Olson, but hard to say, though, who did a better job of stopping Olson in the Rose Bowl -- Norvell or BYU.

I asked if the play calling was too conservative, and Norvell said, “we had execution issues and production issues,” and ordinarily I don’t like to pick on college kids, but apparently Norvell doesn’t have the same problem -- especially if it allows him to shift the blame elsewhere.

“Is there anything else?” he said, while picking up his bag to leave, and running scared is also pretty much the way he coached.

The Bruins had this game won, but instead of going for the knockout, they let everyone who was watching know they don’t really have a lot of confidence in Olson yet.

Olson misfired on third down early, and although he clearly appears to be a work in progress, that’s why games with Stanford and BYU were the ideal laboratory setting.

To win in the Pac-10, the Bruins are going to score big at times and they’re going to have to rely on their play-makers, which means allowing Olson to get the ball to them. Maybe at some point Karl Dorrell will mention that to Norvell.

Norvell had Olson throwing nine times in the first quarter, five in the second, six in the third, and then finally a good sign -- eight times with the game on the line, including four on a big-time final drive. Nice to see the play-caller is capable of making an adjustment, otherwise it’s going to be a season of high expectations gone to waste -- and by their own doing.

HAD A nice chat in the tailgate area before the game with Ronnie Mireles and Deltima, who used to be man and wife, always have been UCLA fans, but are now just friends.

Ronnie, who works for the post office in Bakersfield, has the Bruins beating USC, going 12-0 and playing for the national title in Louisiana. Deltima laughed, which maybe explains why they used to be married.

RAN INTO John Wooden and his daughter, Nan, before the game. Wooden celebrates birthday No. 97 next month, and although they named a post office after him last year, they have apparently run out of nameless buildings. He said there will be a gathering with some of his former players before his birthday, but he will spend Oct. 14 with his family and maybe go out to dinner and pick up the tab “or give money to his family,” he said, “so they can pick up the tab.”

We talked some baseball, but then a woman interrupted to tell Wooden that her father had recently died and he wanted Wooden to have a picture of the Mills Brothers.

“The day that Nellie and I were married, my brother had a car and drove us to Indianapolis,” Wooden said. “We went to see the Mills Brothers, who were making their first appearance there. And they just kept singing and singing.

“It was our wedding day and all, and they just kept singing, and I thought they were going to go all night. They had one encore after another, and I just wanted them to shut up so I could go to bed. But here’s Nellie clapping and clapping and wanting them to keep on going.”

Wooden laughed at the memory, Nan leaning in closer when he mentioned “wedding night,” and Nan saying, “I was waiting to see if I was going to hear any juicy details.”

“We had to catch a bus at 6:30 the next morning to get back to Martinsville,” Wooden said, “because I had to meet my coach at 7:30, and then go away for a week to a coaching clinic.”

A fine way for a marriage to start, but then “it all worked out, didn’t it? -- and very well,” Wooden said, while recalling something Abraham Lincoln had said about “doing the best one can,” and if I had as good a memory as he has, I’d pass it on.

I BEGIN a weeklong journey to Nebraska today, staying on a farm with 400 cows, which will give me a chance to meet my supper before I eat it.

“Are you afraid of horses?” said Debbie Emerton, my host on stop No. 2 in Burwell. “Do we need to get you an old nag?”

I told her I’ve been married for 34 years, so that would seem to be the most comfortable option.

I will be staying in a fraternity house in Lincoln the night before the big game, and I’ve been told, “lucky you,” a toga party is scheduled. According to the folks there, it’s something really new just to hit the Nebraska campus.

TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from KDAY: “Well, T.J., Mr. Wells is now 2-0 as a Dodger.”

And this in an e-mail from Kevin Sellers: “Excited about David Wells yet?”

It’s like Wells said the other day, he’s doing his job, all right, but he can’t always rely on the rest of the Dodgers.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com. To read previous columns, go to latimes.com/simers.