The Moral of the Story

Cindy Trane Christeson

“The word ‘listen’ contains the same letters as the word ‘silent.”’

-- Unknown

My husband, Jon and I recently celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary,

something which is clearly worth celebrating!

We spent it in a most unusual and unforgettable way this year. We went to

a beautiful spot near Santa Barbara, with an incredible view of the ocean

in front of us, and the mountains behind us.

The weather was perfect, the sunsets were incredible and the stars seemed

to dance in the clear night sky. What was unusual about our time was that

we didn’t speak to each other, and our rooms were down the hall from each

other.

The unique arrangement was not due to a marital spat, but was because we

were on a silent retreat with a group from church. I have felt called by

God several times to go on a silent retreat, but it was a call I put on

hold for years.

Though it was our anniversary, both Jon and I agreed that it was the

right time to go. Besides, if both of us drew closer to God, that was a

perfect gift for each other.

Friday night we all shared why we had come. Many of us echoed the

feelings of one man who said, “I have a busy head, a crazy life and a

chaotic house.” Another man stood and said, “I’m here to say thank you to

God. Ten years ago I thought I’d be living on the street for the rest of

my life, but God turned my life around.”

Some of the other reasons included needs for inner healing, guidance,

simplicity and renewed intimacy with God.

A few people were nervous about being quiet. One woman said, “This will

be my first time not to talk. I don’t know if I can do it.”

After the sharing and a time of prayer together, we went silent. We

didn’t talk again until Sunday afternoon. There was a great deal of

unstructured time that we were encouraged to use to read the Bible, pray

and praise God. Our two pastors also suggested that we just sit and do

nothing and be open to God’s love.

Many people took long naps and realized that they were physically and

emotionally exhausted. I went on long hikes both days up in the mountains

and enjoyed incredible views in every direction.

I wasn’t sure if I would be able to do nothing, but I found a beautiful

spot under a tree where I laid on a blanket for hours, soaking in the

scenery and sensing God’s presence and love. I also heard things I

wouldn’t have noticed otherwise, like a woodpecker working, a crow

crowing and leaves rustling in the breeze.

I realized how noisy my inner and outer lives are and how I often say

unnecessary things just to fill silence. It turned out to be refreshing

to not talk. It turned out to be renewing to be still and quiet.

It also turned out to be the most profound experience I’ve had in terms

of my relationship with God.

I’m going to try to slow down, listen more and speak less. And when I

feel God calling me, I’m going to try not to put him on hold. And you can

quote me on that.

CINDY TRANE CHRISTESON is a Newport Beach resident who speaks frequently

to parenting groups. She can be reached via e-mail at cindy@onthegrow.com

or through the mail at P.O. Box 6140-No. 505, Newport Beach 92658.