PETER BUFFA -- Comments & Curiosities

I tried hard to stay out of the Measure A school bond debate. It didn’t

work. I should know better than to get involved in these things, but I

can’t help myself.

I could give you a lengthy and brilliant (of course) argument about

Measure A, and leave you in suspense about where I stand. But both you

and I are much too busy for that.

Here’s where I stand, based on extensive research I’ve done in the last

hour and a number of theories proffered and accepted by no one except me.

Vote for it.

There you have it. If you haven’t already sent in your absentee ballot,

go into the little cardboard box on June 6, pull the Hefty trash bag

curtain behind you and punch out the square marked “yes.”

I don’t like bond issues, especially general obligation bonds, called

“G.O.” bonds in the bond biz. G.O. bonds are a tax. Let’s not kid

ourselves. Do you enjoy new taxes? Nor do I.

But let’s not get crazy about this thing. Measure A will cost every home

and apartment building owner $22 for every $100,000 in assessed value,

every year for the next 25 years.

So if your property’s assessed value is $300,000, Measure A will add $66

a year to your taxes. If your property’s assessed at $1,000,000 -- one,

congratulations, and two, it’ll cost you 200 bucks a year.

Measure that against the fact that the conditions in our schools are an

embarrassment. Leaking roofs, cracking walls, bugs and rats. According to

Robin Sinclair, a college counselor at Newport Harbor High School, “Last

week I had a big rat the size of a Chihuahua in my room.”

We’ll have to drop Robin’s grade for redundancy, but she definitely makes

her point. Even where I come from, a Chihuahua-sized rat is a big boy.

Pretty silly, no? One of the most affluent areas in the country, but our

public schools are crumbling before our eyes. The opponents of Measure A

have asked some good, hard questions.

“How did we come to this pretty pass in the first place?,” for instance,

is a really good one. Answers? Anyone? No? Maybe later. And please, come

up with something more creative than “Prop. 13.”

Here are a few more reasons to vote “yes.”

I’ve seen a lot of bond initiatives come and go, and this is one of the

best crafted I’ve ever seen. It is shot through with safeguards, checks

and balances to make sure the money goes where it’s supposed to go.

I’ve known many of the community volunteers who are working as advocates,

and could serve as members of the oversight committees, for a long time.

They are taking this issue, and their roles, very seriously. They are

putting their reputations on the line and will not hesitate to yank the

Newport-Mesa Unified School District board’s chain real hard if there are

any deviations from the program as promised.

And now, a secret.

Do you know what my real interest in all this is? It’s not leaky roofs or

cracking plaster or Bubba the Rat, as embarrassing as all that may be.

When it comes to schools, the trouble, my friends, is not in our

ceilings. It’s in our standards.

And the trouble began in that all-time favorite period of mine -- the

‘60s. I just cringe whenever I hear some nostalgic ode to those wild and

crazy ‘60s -- Woodstock, hippies, black-light posters. “Tune in, turn on,

drop out.”

In my opinion, the ‘60s weren’t just wild and crazy. They were

catastrophic, in more areas than you can imagine, but none more than drug

abuse and education. The “dumbing down” of America is a huge problem and

it all began with the dumbing down of our schools.

For 30 years, the standards in kindergarten through 12th-grade classrooms

were lowered, lowered, then lowered again. Shall we talk about spelling

skills? Don’t get me started.

Just in the last few years has there been some serious discussion about

restoring standards to reasonable levels. In just one generation, we’ve

lost at least four years of academic performance. Today’s high school

graduates would be very hard pressed to perform at the eighth-grade level

of 1965. Today’s college graduates would be dazed and confused by the

final exams faced by high school seniors in the mid-’60s.

Add the impact of political correctness to the 30-year downward march,

and the net effect is downright frightening.

Case in point. Here are some excerpts from science test papers and essays

from students across the country, from elementary to college level. The

excerpts were compiled not by some pundit, but by the National Education

Association, during its Life Sciences Symposium in Kansas City.

The original spelling has been left “intact.”

“The body consists of three parts -- the branium, the borax, and the

abominable cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the

heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels.”

“H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.”

“When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.”

“Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then

expectoration.”

“The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader.”

“A super saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.”

“A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, two molars, and

eight cuspidors.”

“The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends

towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature

abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.”

“A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.”

“Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.”

“Liter: A nest of young puppies.”

“Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky.”

“Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative

or negative.”

“For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart

stops.”

“For dog bite: put the dog away for several days. If he has not recovered

in several days, then kill it.”

Let’s be fair. There were plenty of dumb answers to go around in 1965,

1935 or 1905. But the difference is, they were the exception, not the

rule.

Vote for Measure A, but more importantly, get up to date with what’s

being taught and learned in today’s classrooms.

That’s all for today. Get your assignments done, papers due next Friday.

I gotta go.

* PETER BUFFA is a former Costa Mesa mayor. His column appears Fridays.

He can be reached via e-mail at o7 PtrB4@aol.comf7 .