CINDY TRANE CHRISTESON -- The Moral of the Story

o7 “Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time. It tells us

to tell each other right now that we love each other.”

f7 -- Leo F. Buscalglia

Unfortunately I have been to five funerals in the last five months.

Fortunately I knew five outstanding individuals whose lives impacted mine

and countless others while they were alive.Their influences will continue

far into the future.

There were many similarities in the funerals. In each service, we

honored and remembered someone special. We celebrated a loving person who

made a difference in our lives. We sang beautiful hymns, listened to

comforting words and heard moving tributes from family, friends and

coworkers. We laughed at some of the funny stories and cried when we

realized the magnitude of the loss.

During each service, I looked around crowded churches and realized

that each of us present could probably share many stories about what the

person had meant to us. It would take days for everyone to recount the

love that had been shown and the encouragement that had been given. There

is no way to measure the many ways these people inspired young and old

alike.

I recently overheard a woman say to her friend, “What difference does

one person really make anyway?”

I wanted to interrupt and say, “Let me tell you about five men and

women who showed that one person makes more of a difference than anybody

will ever know. The hundreds who filled the churches proved the impact

and influence of an individual.”

While working on this column, I read the following verses in my Bible:

“A good reputation is more valuable than the most expensive perfume,”

and “It is better to spend your time at funerals than at festivals. For

you are going to die, and you should think about it while there is still

time.”

I reread the verses and realized that I had been to funerals of five

people who clearly made the most of their time while they were on this

earth. I like to think that those five wonderful people are now enjoying

a well-deserved reward in heaven.

I heard a great comment about heaven at one of the services.

Thirteen-year-old Grant was with his grandfather when he passed away.

Afterwards Grant asked his pastor, “Why was his mouth opened when he

died?”

His pastor answered, “It’s because he saw heaven and he said, ‘Wow.”’

At another funeral, the pastor told us that our present sorrow is a

measure of the joy that our loved ones brought to our lives. He added,

“Pain and joy are not mutually exclusive. Joy is not the absence of

pain, but the presence of God. Let God comfort you.”

Another pastor pointed to the future, saying “God loved each of you

enough to bless you with this person who was so special in your lives.

He’ll be faithful to continue loving you even after they are gone.”

The services reminded me to trust God with my present and my future.

The people, who we will miss and whose lives we celebrated, reminded me

to live purposefully and to love freely.

And you can quote me on that.

* CINDY TRANE CHRISTESON is a Newport Beach resident who speaks

frequently to parenting groups. She may be reached via e-mail at o7

cindy@onthegrow.comf7 or through the mail at P.O. Box 6140-No. 505,

Newport Beach, CA 92658.