ROBERT GARDNER -- The Verdict

The old Newport Beach City Hall originally was a two-room schoolhouse.

When converted to a city hall, one room housed the city clerk and the

city treasurer. The other room, one night a month, was the meeting place

for the City Council. It was a multipurpose room the rest of the time.

It was, among other things, my courtroom when I was the city judge of

Newport Beach.

The “bench” was simply a desk on a slightly elevated platform. It

overlooked the long table at which the City Council met. However, during

the time when it wasn’t being used by that group, it was the workplace

for some people from the county auditor’s office who spent their days

poring over big books. They never looked up and seemed impervious to the

other activities going on.

Take me, for instance. I was looking right down on them, but they

never looked up.

Over to my right when I was on my so-called bench was a machine, a

very noisy machine, which was putting out water bills. Again, the lady

operating that noisy machine ignored me.

To my left was a representative from the Department of Motor Vehicles

who was putting out driver’s licenses. Directly behind me on the wall was

the eye chart used by the man giving out driver’s licenses.

Some odd things happened as a result of that eye chart. Drunks would

come in and when I would ask their names, as often as not, they would

start reading letters off the eye chart.

In one corner was a small office which housed a desk and two chairs.

In that desk was a bottle of whiskey. That was the office of Frank

Rinehart, the city clerk. Frank explained that the bottle was for public

relations.

So in my so-called courtroom, you could get a driver’s license, pay

your water bill, complain about your assessment and get a drink of

whiskey from Frank Rinehart. And if you wanted to wait around for a

couple hours, one night a month you could attend a City Council meeting.

Now, when young judges in the Orange County courthouse complain about

their accommodations, I just smile and tell them about my original

judicial accommodations. That usually stops the complaining.

* ROBERT GARDNER is a Corona del Mar resident and a former judge. His

column appears Tuesdays.