JUDGE GARDNER -- The Verdict

Whatever the authorities decide to do about Crystal Cove, I would like

the opportunity to place a plaque at the entrance. Oh, nothing large or

ostentatious. Just something small and in good taste.

The reason? That cove was the scene of one of the more traumatic

events in a life not entirely without traumatic events.

Many, many moons ago I was going with a very nice girl whose family

had a house in Crystal Cove. It happened that one night I had a date with

that girl. We were supposed to go to a party in Fullerton where she

lived, but with teenage lust in my soul, I suggested we go down to her

parents’ house in the Cove. With some reservation she agreed, and so,

without informing her parents of the change in plans, off we went.

As I have said, she was a very nice girl, and after about a two-hour

wrestling match, her virtue triumphed over my lust, and I acknowledged

defeat.

Meanwhile, it had been raining. My mind on other things, I hadn’t paid

the weather any attention until we prepared to leave -- and then I

discovered that the road to the highway was washed out. Being a

single-minded youngster, I suggested we go back to the house and pick up

where we had left off, but she was too sensible for that, and so we just

sat there and froze in my dilapidated old Chevy convertible.

As we sat there, the full impact of our situation finally hit me. I

was going to have some large inventing to explain to her parents how we

went to a party in Fullerton and didn’t get home until the next morning.

I thought and thought, but no plausible explanation occurred.

The next morning some men came and filled in the road so that we could

leave the Cove. But how to explain the lapsed time? There was some road

construction on the way home. I might not have been able to think of a

story, but I could recognize an opportunity when I saw one. I simply

drove into the ditch and sat there until the crew showed up. They pulled

us out, I got their names and what the job was, and then I drove the girl

home with a perfect alibi.

That’s why I remember Crystal Cove.

* ROBERT GARDNER is a Corona del Mar resident and a former judge. His

column runs Tuesdays.