JUDGE GARDNER -- The Verdict

Back in the 1950s, Joe Collins, Bill Silzle and I were into what we

called skin diving -- what is now called free diving, diving without

scuba. Our gear was rather primitive, but the diving conditions made up

for any defect in our gear. A great kelp patch ran from Corona del Mar to

San Diego. The kelp was so thick that when you dove at low tide you

carefully picked an open spot in which to surface. Otherwise, you could

drown a few inches from the surface, entangled in kelp.

And so it was that on one occasion we were diving in the kelp patch

off Little Corona when I ran into a rather large whale, which had come

into the kelp to brush off whatever marine growth on its body was

bothersome. As it swam by, I gave it a whack with my abalone iron, which

didn’t seem to bother it a bit.

I surfaced and told Bill and Joe about the big whale in the kelp.

Since Joe had a camera and Bill had a boat, we conceived of the brilliant

idea of forcing the whale to the surface, then taking a picture of it for

an outdoor magazine, something like Field and Stream.

They got their equipment, and I went down and poked at the whale until

I finally persuaded it to surface.

They pulled me in the boat, Joe sat in the bow and Bill took the

wheel, and the great chase ensued. The whale would surface, blow, then

submerge. We would try to figure out where it was going to surface, head

that way and wait, but it was a very contrary beast. Over and over again

it would surface in the wrong place, according to our calculations.

We were persistent, however, and finally the whale surfaced right in

front of the boat. It was so close, in fact, that Joe could have reached

out and touched it. He snapped the picture, and we had visions of

publication -- a feature, at least, maybe even a cover.

As I said, we got close to the whale, too close, in fact. Have you

ever seen a photograph of a piece of sandpaper close up? That’s what our

picture looked like. It was so bad that we not only couldn’t make Field

and Stream, we couldn’t even keep the picture for a scrapbook.

So much for amateur photographers.

* ROBERT GARDNER is a Corona del Mar resident and a former judge. His

column runs Tuesdays.