EDITORIAL

One of the county’s hot little news items last week was the decision

by Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant not to buy a luxurious, pirate-shipped

estate in the gated community of Coto de Caza.

Business issues were part of the problem, but what also played into

the pullout (different than his usual pull-ups) was a concern about

privacy and safety, totally understandable given the area’s nouveau-riche

nature. You just know his neighbors -- who through dumb luck made

millions in the ‘90s boom -- would’ve been doing slow drive-bys, gawking,

hoping to catch a glimpse of Kobe and his wife, Vanessa. It’s a deep

shame that those uncouth masses -- their license plate frames read, of

all things: “One of a kind” -- would keep the couple from buying a

$13.5-million home near where she grew up, Huntington Beach.

Now, the Bryants’ “people” aren’t saying whether they are still

looking to buy in the area, but knowing how important family is, here’s a

suggestion: Buy in Newport Beach.

It’s a no-brainer, really. Newport Beach has a long history of housing

celebrities, from John Wayne to Mo Vaughn, so another famous face won’t

bat a single eye. It’s right next door to Vanessa’s hometown, making

family visits easy (and with Kobe’s security, certainly he won’t have to

worry about unexpected pop-in visits from the in-laws). And while the

couple might not be able to find a home with another fake pirate ship, if

they bought on the harbor front they could have a real ship to sail.

Newport Beach is perfect for this NBA star.

NBA star. Why does that sound familiar? Of course. This plan really is

perfect. Maybe Newport Beach can make a deal, a trade, with Coto de Caza:

Dennis Rodman, who loves the limelight and won’t mind the neighbors

nosing around, for Kobe, who can enjoy the peace and quite a

Rodman-partyless Newport would offer.