PETER BUFFA -- Comments & Curiosities

Well, I’m back. Not tan, not fit, not rested, but back nonetheless. So

what have you been up to? If my back issues of the Pilot are any

indication, it has been a busy time in the land of Newport-Mesa. I notice

the “Great Park” initiative developed a bad case of Dutch elm disease,

once again, when Judge James Gray called the initiative’s “Title and

Summary” misleading and tossed it out. This will bring great sadness to

the South. “Title & Summary,” by the way, is one element in the wonderful

world of “ballot language” -- i.e., the stuff you read on your ballot and

in your voter’s pamphlet. How important is ballot language? It’s

critical. You wouldn’t believe the amount of hand-wringing and grimacing

that goes into what to call someone or something.

In the time it takes political combatants to decide what to call

themselves and whatever they’re pitching, a Japanese monk could toss off

a watercolor of a peacock in a field of cherry blossoms and a haiku about

a birch tree. For instance, I should not have called it the “Great Park”

initiative. That was stupid of me. It’s the “Orange County Central Park

and Nature Preserve Initiative.” And, I might add, the people pitching it

are not airport opponents. They are “The Committee for Safe and Healthy

Communities.” The subtext, of course, is that living near an airport is

unhealthy, if not downright lethal. Apparently, the deadly “airport rays”

are not bad if you’re north of the El Toro “Y,” but will turn everything

south of it into a post-nuclear wasteland. Sooner or later -- and you can

say you heard it here first -- the entire Great Park debate will focus on

“our kids.” It’s the law. I don’t care if it’s airports, immigration, gas

mileage requirements or prescription drugs for seniors, each side will

eventually plead with us to not “hurt our kids” by not voting their way.

Is there anything more fun than politics? I say there is not.

I was also saddened and troubled to see that Costa Mesa decided not to

enact a proposed ban on keeping or exhibiting exotic animals. How long

will this issue go unaddressed? I’ve got to know. Personally, I can’t

tell you how many complaints I have filed with City Hall over unwanted

visits in our backyard by possums and, at least twice a month, somebody’s

Bengal tiger. No collar, no tags, nothing. It is so frustrating. No

sooner do I put out some food (“Whiskas,” original recipe) for our cat,

than this tiger appears out of nowhere and gobbles it down. Hear me well

on this. The exotic animal problem in this city is a tragedy waiting to

happen.

What else is happening? I notice Newport Beach is thinking about

buying the Dunes. Interesting. Could be a good thing, but if I were king,

and thank God I’m not, I would think very deep thoughts before I pulled

out my Platinum card.

All the huffing and puffing and heavy lifting at the San Diego Freeway

and Harbor Boulevard seem to be going well. Great mounds of dirt are

being moved about, and the freeway is getting wider, which is a good

thing. Better onramps, north and south, will bring joy and a sense of

inner peace to the Harbor-Gisler regulars, which include me. And, for us

toll road fans, the San Diego Freeway improvements will go a long way

toward relieving the severe acid reflux that occurs every afternoon as

the northbound Corona del Mar Freeway merges with the San Diego one.

Weather-wise, things are quite pleasant, no? A little muggy, but that

could be just me. By the way, did the weather gurus create a new buzzword

this year, or have I just missed it before now? “Monsoon flow.” It used

to be “moist air from Mexico.” Now it’s “monsoon flow.” I’ve even heard a

few weather people try to turn monsoon into an adjective by adding “al”

to it -- i.e., “monsoonal.” Yikes. Totally illegal. Then again, people in

the weather biz love buzzwords. “Offshore eddy, onshore flow, cutoff

low.” There’s probably a better term for it, but I’d say it’s been a

“darn good” summer so far, with the exception of a few days of “monsoon

flow.” Of course, most of us forget that September is the hottest month

of the year. We get a few days of cooler weather around Labor Day and

decide it’s time to put away the sunscreen and the lawn chairs. It’s a

head fake. Another week and the place is one big pizza oven. I fall for

it every year.

All in all, I say things are looking good. There’s plenty of summer

left, the parking lots at South Coast Plaza and Fashion Island are

bustling (a key economic indicator), and the “power shortage” is now the

crisis that wasn’t. Incredible? A few months ago, every newscast was a

survivalist’s dream come true: prepare for massive blackouts, get

emergency rations, traffic signals and air traffic control systems could

go down like giant redwoods at any moment. Turn those appliances off and

shut down your computer between keystrokes. Today? Energy surpluses are

costing tens of millions of dollars, and the state may start urging us to

use more electricity. Is this a great country or what? If we could just

get this exotic animal problem taken care of before someone gets eaten,

it would be the perfect summer. I gotta go.

* PETER BUFFA is a former Costa Mesa mayor. His column runs Sundays.

He may be reached via e-mail at o7 PtrB4@aol.comf7 .