THEATER

Tom Titus

One month ago today, Costa Mesa’s Amy Decker was on a plane at Newark

Airport, waiting to take off on a flight to Orange County. Decker created

a lot of drama for audiences when she starred in three musicals between

1995 and 1997 at Estancia High School, but it was nothing compared with

the drama of Sept. 11.

That fateful day, when an attack destroyed New York’s World Trade

Center Twin Towers, Decker -- now living in New York and pursuing a

professional career in theater -- had her laptop computer with her. She

set down her thoughts minute by minute as the drama unfolded around her.

“While we were sitting there waiting for the plane to take off, the

pilot said that if we looked out the left side of the plane we could see

a fire in one of the World Trade Towers, and sure enough, I looked out

the window and there it was.

“Nobody really thought anything about it. I mean, yes, it was awful,

but we had no idea what actually happened. We were sitting on the runway

and then all of a sudden the pilot said that the airport was closed and

that we were returning to the gate.”

By the time Decker exited the plane, the second plane had hit the

other tower and “everyone was crowding around the TV in the local snack

bars. I rushed to a phone to call my mom to tell her that I was delayed

and that I didn’t know when I would get on a plane again. When I hung up,

the pay phones were dead.”

A few minutes later, she wrote, “They just evacuated the entire

airport and I am sitting outside on the grass waiting for I don’t know

what. One of the towers collapsed a little while ago. I just can’t

believe this whole situation. I have never been so terrified and lost in

my life. Hundreds of us are sitting here and no one knows what is going

on.

“I am never going to be able to leave this place, and of course I

can’t go home because all of the tunnels and bridges into the city are

closed. This whole situation is so unreal. I just hate going through all

of this alone.

“I just don’t know what to believe anymore. I feel like the world is

coming to an end or something. I just want to get the hell out of New

York and I have never felt that way before.”

Decker couldn’t get to a phone to call friends in the city, but she

met a New Jersey woman in the terminal who was on her flight to

California, and offered to put her up at her own home.

“This is just so scary,” she wrote. “Some people are saying that

flights won’t be leaving Newark for the rest of the week. I personally

think they are overreacting, but I certainly don’t want to get on a plane

any time soon.

“This feels like a bad dream. I am just speechless. I am trying to be

calm, but I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t even believe that

I am never going to see the towers again. The New York City skyline will

never be the same.

“I can’t stop thinking about all of those people. I am just

devastated. I am so happy that I was still on the ground when those

planes crashed, but I can’t help but think that I am trying to fly to

California.

“Hey, the people that work here just brought us pizza! At least I’m

stranded with caring people. I am very fortunate. Not only am I still

alive, but also I am not completely alone. I just don’t know what is

going to happen next.”

Eventually, Decker got a ride to her new friend’s house in New Jersey.

All the main roads were closed for emergency vehicles, she noted. “Many

times we got lost and every time we asked a cop for directions, they

basically told us that we couldn’t get home tonight.”

Finally, they reached her friend’s home using a back road.

This was Decker’s home away from home for the next two days, and she

was beginning to feel the strain. “I really want to go home,” she wrote.

“I have been wearing the same clothes for three days now, and for the

past two nights I have slept on a couch, and I am in an unfamiliar place

surrounded by people that I don’t know.”

Finally, on Sept. 13, she was able to return to her New York City

apartment. Her thoughts as she expressed them at the time:

“I can’t even begin to tell you how great it is to be back. It is a

little scary knowing that I am currently living in, and am in for that

matter, the city where all of this horror and destruction occurred, but

this is my home, and boy have I missed it.

“I have been on the phone all day calling friends and family and

letting them know that I’m OK. And you know, many people have asked me if

I really want to get on a plane.

“This is how I see it. During these next days and weeks, these are

going to be the safest flights in United States history. What better time

to fly? And secondly, I am not going to allow myself to be another victim

of these terrorists. I refuse to sit at home in fear and cancel my plans,

because that is one more small battle that they will have won.

“This is exactly what they want. They want to take away our freedom

and keep us living in fear. We are never really safe on this planet; too

many things could always go wrong. But it is only when we refuse to allow

our fears to take over and consume our lives that we become truly free.

“Now, I am by no means saying that we should all party and forget this

happened. Oh, no. I am truly sorry for everyone that lost someone that

they knew or loved in this tragedy. I just refuse to sit back and let

[them] win.”

* TOM TITUS writes about and reviews local theater for the Daily

Pilot. His stories appear Thursdays and Saturdays.