The Moral of the Story -- Cindy Trane Christeson

“We make decisions, and then turn around and the decisions make us.”

-- F.W. Borcham

I’ve really enjoyed hearing from so many of you about last week’s

column on change. The number of e-mails, phone calls and visits around

town have shown that we have all been wrestling with the fact that one

thing that we can count on in life is change.

Several of you expressed that you could relate to what you read, and

felt like it was written just for you. I’m always excited when God works

through the column to help others in any way. That is one of the prayers

I pray each week as I greet my computer and deadline. I also want to tell

you how much I appreciated hearing from you, because each time, God

worked through our interchanges to give me words of encouragement just

when I needed them.

Every year I hear or read story after story about how quickly New

Year’s resolutions become last week’s regrets. I’ve also heard that the

first weeks of January are the busiest weeks of the year at gyms because

people start out wanting to make changes, but it isn’t long before many

of thosememberships are nothing more than memories or identification

cards tucked away in gym bags.

One friend told me that she wanted to lose weight but that she would

never diet because she knew she’d fail. “How can I succeed at something

that has a name that starts with the word “die?” She said. “I’d be

embarrassed to tell you how many self-help books sit on my shelf and how

little self-help I’ve ever actually accomplished.”

My friend’s comments started me thinking about one possible reason why

so many New Year’s resolutions fail. More often than not these changes in

self seem to be focused on external changes, such as losing weight,

getting in shape or becoming more organized.

I realized that any time I try to make changes in myself with only my

own self-discipline, nothing lasts very long. I am not strong enough on

my own. I need God. So this year, I’ve decided to try something

different. This idea occurred to me when I looked up quotes for last

week’s column on change. I think God was trying to get a message to me

when I repeatedly found that the word “change” was right between the

words “challenge” and “character” in several of my books.

I sensed God challenging me to let him make some changes in my

character. So, instead of a self-help approach, I’ve decided to pray for

“God-help,” for God’s guidance and strength. This means I need to pray

and listen to God more every day. Hopefully, some positive internal

changes will lead to some positive external changes as well.

Instead of resolutions, based on myself, I’m praying for decisions,

blessed by God.

And you can quote me on that.

* CINDY TRANE CHRISTESON is a Newport Beach resident who speaks

frequently to parenting groups. She may be reached via e-mail at o7

cindy@onthegrow.comf7 or through the mail at P.O. Box 6140-No. 505,

Newport Beach, CA 92658.