Comments & Curiosities -- Peter Buffa

What do you get when you cross a federal court and fireworks? Most of

the time, nothing. But every once in a while, if the conditions are just

right, you get a decision that goes kaboom!

We’ve had two of those in the last week. The first was the

announcement that there will be no more boom-boom on the Fourth of July

at the Newport Dunes Waterfront Resort. The second was the decision by

the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeal that the Pledge of Allegiance is

“unconstitutional.” Can you say “bonehead?” It’s easy: first syllable,

“bone”; second syllable, “head.” Together, they make a slang expression

that means “bonehead.”

My personal rant about the Pledge decision will begin momentarily, and

I suspect you’ve already had yours. But here’s something that should make

us all feel a little bit better anyway. This ruling is DOA, which is an

acronym for “dead on arrival,” which means, “dead” as in, “dead” as in,

“not alive.” Attorney General John Ashcroft has already requested a

rehearing before the full appeals panel, where this thing will almost

assuredly be overturned.

It also seems the man who wrote the opinion, Judge Alfred T. Goodwin,

who despite all indications is not related to Alfred E. Newman, is well

aware of how badly he butchered this one because he issued a stay on his

own ruling. I for one am sorry that this thing is never going to make it

to the highest court in the land. The Supreme Court justices would be

waiting for this one at the top of those impressive steps, aluminum bats

in hand, all of them begging Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist to let

them have the first shot.

When lower court judges have a little accident, the current Supreme

Court has a real talent, thankfully, for grabbing them by the back of the

neck, rubbing their noses in it and saying, in a very firm voice, “Did

you do that?” What really irks me about the Pledge decision, though, is

how many times must we go through this?

The idea that the mere mention of the word “God” in a governmental

setting violates the First Amendment has been argued again and again and

again. “One nation under God” in the Pledge, “In God We Trust” on our

money, “So help me God” while being sworn in -- all of them have been

challenged over and over. And the answer from the courts is invariably

the same: “No, not, never, forget it, go home, go away.”

The First Amendment says, “Congress shall make no law respecting an

establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof.” Now

I ask you, is that so hard to understand? Trying to equate mouthing the

word “God” with passing a law that affects an establishment of religion

just plain doesn’t work, legally or logically. If it did, then why on

earth would the same people who wrote that amendment sprinkle references

to God throughout every official document they wrote? Ridiculous, I tell

you.

Speaking of duds, that brings us to the decision to end the fireworks

at the Dunes. Would anyone mind terribly if we hold on to just one or two

of our local traditions? Fish Fry? Gonzo. Fireworks at the Dunes? Finito.

The reported reason for canceling the fireworks display was liability.

I think not. The city of Newport Beach graciously offered to help out

with the liability costs but the answer was still no.

In this year of all years, what could be better than the biggest,

noisiest Fourth of July party ever? Couldn’t we listen to John Adams’

request one more time and give that cranky old man what he wished for on

Independence Day? “It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with

shows, games, sports, bells, bonfires and illuminations,” said Adams,

“from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward,

forevermore.”

On July 4, 1776, the party for Philadelphia freedom raged through the

night, and well into the next day. Fireworks on the Fourth of July --

bright red, white and blue threads in the American tapestry. I would say

cool it on the bonfires, but come on, lads, you’ve got three days to get

this thing straightened out so we can all look skyward and ooh and aaah

one more time. Somebody out there, make it happen.

I gotta go.

* PETER BUFFA is a former Costa Mesa mayor. His column runs Sundays.

He may be reached via e-mail at PtrB4@aol.com.