Laguna on a schtick

Tom Titus

When the cast members of “Lagunatics,” the musical roast of life

on the coast, draw a blank on a line or a dance movement in

rehearsal, they usually ask the kids.

Samantha Morrice, 13, and Kira Josephson, 14, are the youngest

performers in the cast of the No Square Theater’s offbeat variety

show, which will be presented next weekend at the Forum Theater on

the Festival of Arts grounds.

Already accomplished performers, the girls are featured

singer/dancers in the production and also serve as dance captains to

the sometimes-forgetful adult hoofers.

“Samantha knows the words and movements to practically every song

in the show,” exclaims cast member Rick Breco, “so if you can’t

remember a step or a lyric, you can always get it from her.”

Breco, a hair stylist at Furioso, plays a gleeful cop who nabs

local printer Margo Burgess in the number “You Got a Ticket Again.”

It’s sung to the music of “Let’s Do the Time Warp Again” from “The

Rocky Horror Picture Show.”

Parking problems also come up for some topical jibes in the number

“Parking, Parking,” sung to the tune of “Cabaret’s” “Money, Money,”

and features the show’s choreographer, Steve Josephson and publicist

Lisa Morrice lamenting the paucity of parking spaces in Laguna Beach.

The variety show’s creator and co-writer, Bree Burgess Rosen,

draws heavily on her career as a former Las Vegas vocalist and

showgirl. When she’s not singing, dancing or directing, she’s

designing and assembling the show’s costumes -- which can border on

the outrageous.

“One of the actors is wearing a palm tree, another a giant

baseball, and still others enter with dolphins on their heads,” Rosen

says.

Speaking of sea creatures, the number “Wyland” pokes fun at the

prolific whale-drawing artist’s showrooms, turning them into the new

Disneyland. Laguna High graduate Gretchen Murray and a bevy of cast

members appear in seafaring and ocean motifs, including city Arts

Commissioner Pat Kollenda, who emerges as a giant octopus.

“I am honored and privileged to play the role of Miss Tuna Laguna

in ‘Wyland,’ ” Kollenda grins.

Man-made creations aren’t the only subjects for spoofing in

“Lagunatics.” Kollenda joins Carol Robinson, Meredith Woodson and Pat

Warren in “Get a Sandbag” (a parody of the pop oldie “Mr. Sandman”)

to satirize the ravages of El Nino.

Politics, to be sure, comes in for a few well-honed jibes. Even

though he’s been out of office for a few years, Bill Clinton provides

satiric ammunition for Jay Skovek in the “Oklahoma”-inspired number

“I’m Just a Guy Who Can’t Say No,” while Meredith Woodson dons a

black wig and blue dress, impersonating Monica Lewinsky singing “Take

Back Your Stuff” (suggested by “Take Back Your Mink” from “Guys and

Dolls”).

The “Lagunatics” raise the curtain on their wild and wacky

production next week, with performances at 8 p.m. Wednesday through

Saturday and 7 p.m. Sunday. The Friday through Sunday stagings will

be preceded by a food and wine reception.

Tickets are priced at $50 for the Wednesday and Thursday shows and

$75 for the weekend events, including the receptions. Contact the No

Square Theater at (949) 497-2584 for more information.

* TOM TITUS reviews local theater for the Coastline Pilot.