Haunting memories

Deirdre Newman

He tells his story to warn people.

He tells his story to describe the unspeakable horror he

experienced.

He tells his story to help himself heal psychologically.

Ultimately, Steve Cabler, the Newport Beach surfer, musician and

artist who survived the terrorist attack in Bali a month ago, tells

his story to jolt Southern Californians out of what he considers to

be their denial that an attack will ever happen here.

“My main thing is, I feel for some reason God wanted me to live to

prepare people for future things, so people in sheltered Los Angeles

and Orange County don’t feel untouchable,” Cabler said. “Because I

got touched.”

Cabler, 42, has shared his ordeal with People magazine, Rolling

Stone magazine and the Dr. Phil TV show.

Closer to home, Cabler has another outlet for his story to be

heard as the official spokesman for Surfers4Peace, an organization

set up by two longtime friends to raise money for him and other

surfers in need.

Most of the early money raised will help pay off Cabler’s expenses

and medical bills -- he has been unable to work because of the

injuries he sustained -- and to support a memorial fund for Steve

Webster, the Huntington Beach surfer who perished in the Oct. 12

blast while on the trip with Cabler.

Through benefit concerts, golf tournaments, surf contests and

other means, the organization will also help other American surfers

who are injured locally or abroad.

“To be able to help surfers in need by surfers themselves is

gratifying,” said Joe Myerchin, one of the organization’s

co-founders.

Like any story about a life-threatening experience, Cabler’s is

laced with sheer randomness and small miracles that resulted from raw

courage and determination. When he relates his experience, he uses an

aerial map from a Singapore paper that he has marked to show where he

was sitting in the Sari Club when the attack occurred.

Each time he relates the story, he gets a little more detached

from the memories of the apocalyptic scene he escaped from.

“It’s a journey,” Cabler said from his home Wednesday. “It starts

to get old after a while. I used to start crying and whining, but I

can’t do that anymore.”

His story began even before he left for Bali in what seemed like a

random conversation with friend Jon Richards, who narrowly escaped a

fiery death himself when he rescued another friend from a burning

mobile home.

Richards saw Cabler a few days before he left and in telling him

about his experience, unknowingly relayed what would be much-needed

advice.

“He told me, ‘You don’t stop [in a fire], you just keep moving or

you die,’” Cabler said. “I remember hearing what he said [in Bali].”

Cabler and Webster had gone to Bali to surf its unparalleled

waves. Cabler was so enamored with Bali culture that he has a tattoo

of the Balinese god, The Barang, on his arm.

They were at the Sari Nightclub on Oct. 12 to celebrate Webster’s

41st birthday, which had occurred a few nights before. They were

scheduled to leave the island less than 48 hours later.

Because the nightclub was so packed, they sat in an area near the

left front corner, where they wouldn’t normally sit, Cabler said -- a

move he says saved his life. A few minutes before 11 p.m., the first

bomb rocked Paddy’s Discotheque, which was next to the Sari Club,

Cabler said.

From where they were sitting, they could see the bomb explode.

Before they had any time to react, a second bomb exploded right in

front of them outside the Sari Club, blocking the only exit, Cabler

said.

“I didn’t even get to look at my friend,” Cabler recalled.

Since Cabler was sitting closest to the front of the nightclub,

his left ear was completely vaporized by the explosion. As he stood

up to the left of the seat where he and Webster were sitting, Webster

stood to the right and was immediately crushed under a grass roof

hanging from the center of the nightclub.

“After the first blast, [the nightclub] lost all electricity

except for the fire,” Cabler recalled. “Everything was made of wood

and started to burn. I couldn’t lift the roof off [Webster] because

my hands were burned and I couldn’t see.”

Cabler started to run toward the corner of the nightclub and

realized he was trapped by something wedged into the ground at a

45-degree angle. As the flames swirled around him, Cabler tried to

break down the barrier with the force of his body weight. He said the

outfit he was wearing -- a long-sleeved Black Flys T-shirt and

Dickies pants -- made him sweat so much that it repelled the flames.

“The flames were covering me -- I can’t explain it,” Cabler said.

“But before you die, you almost relinquish, so I started to do that

for a minute. Then, something just changed in me. I would not die. I

made it this far and I just went for it.”

As soon as he got through, he was confronted by his next crucible

-- a metal wall butting up against another wall. Cabler figured that

if there was a seam in the fence, it would be where a pole was

visible. So using football moves that instinctually kicked in, he

again tried to break down the wall with his bodyweight. On the second

try, one of the bones in the back of his right shoulder buckled, but

the pole finally popped loose about a foot and Cabler was able to

crawl through out to the street.

“There were body parts everywhere because all the passersby got

blown to pieces,” Cabler said. “It was like [a bomb had exploded on]

Main Street in Huntington Beach on a Saturday night. I thought,

whoever set off the bomb would try to shoot me. I had vertigo, so I

could only run about 20 feet. Then I would fall on my head. Outside

everything was on fire.”

After Cabler collapsed on the ground, an American man and a

Balinese man came to his aid. They tried to get him to a hospital,

but most were full, so they took him to a hotel, Cabler said.

The next morning, he finally made it back to his own hotel. He

wound up being the first to tell Webster’s wife, Mona, that her

husband was missing and presumed dead.

After getting about one hour of sleep because he had a concussion,

Cabler scoured every hospital in the area looking for Webster on the

slim chance he was still alive. When Webster wasn’t found, Cabler

started searching the morgues, stumbling through hundreds of body

parts, he said.

This week, Indonesian police arrested the owner of the minivan

they say was used in the bombing, and evidence continues to mount

that the attack was connected to the terrorist group Al Qeada.

Upon his return, Cabler learned that, in addition to the burns on

his hands, which have almost healed, he had a broken scapula, severe

hearing loss in both ears, tinnitus and vertigo from the damage to

his left ear. He is starting to regain his hearing.

If the vertigo is permanent, he will not be able to drive or surf,

he said.

In retrospect, Cabler credits his survival to his experience with

surfing and music.

“I have faced life and death many times in the surf,” Cabler said.

“And I’m used to being on stage in front of people. You have to be

precise in both. I looked deep inside and found a way out.”

Cabler’s heroic efforts in creating an opening in the fiery

wreckage allowed up to 30 Australian tourists to escape, according to

the Australian consulate, he said.

Cabler is eternally grateful to his friends for coming to his

financial aid and launching the Surfers4Peace organization and Web

site. Cabler asked Myerchin and co-founder Adam Grossman to put

graphic photos of the attack on the Web site so people could get an

accurate picture of what happened.

“People need to know,” Cabler said. “These people hate us. They

want us dead ....It will happen here, It needs to happen before

people understand the magnitude.”

Surfers4Peace.com was recently voted Web site of the week on

Surfline.com.

Since he can’t sing these days because of his hearing loss,

Cabler, the lead singer of the band El Centro, said he will focus on

writing songs that reflect the maelstrom of emotion he has

experienced.

“I will write kind of a ballady acoustical song for a friend about

what happened and some angry stuff,” Cabler said. “The band will be a

lot more political after this. I feel like I need to step up.”

For his day-to-day affairs, Cabler depends on the kindness of

friends to drive him to the doctor and other errands. He is consoled

in his recovery by Richards, who suffered severe burns over a good

portion of his body from his ordeal.

“Healing takes time,” Richards said. “[Cabler’s] a strong guy.

He’s a great person. He will get through this pretty well. I hope

people will listen to what he has to say.”