Steven Soderbergh’s attempt to be a...

Steven Soderbergh’s attempt to be a serious auteur produces a

pompous, boring and uneven work. It is an adaptation of a landmark

1972 Soviet film by Russian director Andrei Tarkovsky, which was

itself based on the original 1961 novel by Polish author Stanislaw

Lem.

The disavowing James Cameron, who credits Soderbergh exclusively

for the script and direction, produced Solaris. Unlike the movie

“Titanic,” this film sinks, and does so ... slow ... ly.

“Solaris” is a disjointed love story set within a nebulous science

fiction framework. The story, which takes place at some vague point

in the future, opens with Dr. Chris Kelvin (George Clooney) being

asked to investigate the unexplained behavior of a small group of

scientists aboard the space station Prometheus, who have cut off all

communication with Earth.

Kelvin is shocked by what he finds upon his arrival. His good

friend Gibarian has committed suicide, and that the two remaining

scientists are exhibiting signs of stress and paranoia caused by the

planet Solaris, which resembles a static lavender static ball.

Jeremy Davies, as one of those scientists and the only interesting

character in the movie, steals every scene he is in. Viola Davis is

competent as the other scientist, who is always on edge.

Natascha McElhone, who plays Kelvin’s dead wife, is an odd choice

to play beside Clooney. Her golf-ball-size eyes and Amazon-like

cheekbones almost seem to engulf every frame she shares with him. In

a way, this does lend an amount of dread and suspense to the film,

but not the way it should have been intended.

Clooney displays an ability to be utterly boring while spouting

poor dialogue and showcasing his derriere a few times in multiple

“flashbacks” -- pun intended. The gratuitous display of Clooney’s

buttocks amounts to a failed attempt to wake up half of the audience.

Clooney also spends a good deal of time sweating for no reason.

If you go to see this film, you can also look forward to seeing

numerous, identical and numbing views of the purplish, gassy planet,

as well as unexplained blood stains, mysterious pills and unexplained

damage to Kelvin’s quarters. The screening I attended was attended

fairly well, but numerous audience members walked out midway through

the film. When the credits rolled and Soderbergh’s name apin large

type, the audience leapt to their feet not to applaud, but to exit as

if there were a fire. Perhaps they, too, were also queasy from the

inane, meandering and repetitive musical score.

I applaud serious science fiction, and slow, churning movies, but

I have to at least be engaged by them.

Soderbergh is too caught up in trying to cross “2001: A Space

Odyssey” with “Dragonfly” that he loses most of the audience after

the first 10 minutes. Serious themes are batted about, but never

fully explored or realized, making “Solaris” best when left

undiscovered.

* RAY BUFFER, 33, is a professional singer, actor and voice-over

artist.

Diagnosis is, ‘Analyze That’ a lot of laughs

A mob boss who’s a menacing killer and a threat to society is

really just acting out the pain of his childhood. That was the

premise of “Analyze This,” and it’s the premise of the sequel,

“Analyze That.”

In this chapter, mobster Paul Vitti (Robert De Niro) is released

from prison into the custody of his therapist Dr. Ben Sobel (Billy

Crystal), and he lives in Sobel’s home. The movie’s plot has more

holes than the body of a Teamsters Union president, but it doesn’t

matter, because it’s all very funny.

The theme of the movie is exposing bad guy Vitti to own his

humanity and vulnerability. When his humanity is exposed, his

attempts to be a scary, tough guy just seem absurd. De Niro brings

the toughness and the vulnerability to Vitti that are necessary to

make this movie funny. The movie doesn’t make fun of Vitti for

getting in touch with his affection for his father and crying. It

makes fun of the way he tries to use threats and intimidation to sell

new cars. OK -- all car salesmen try to use threats and intimidation,

but we’re usually not afraid of them. “Analyze That” takes guys who’d

shoot you dead before they have breakfast and neuters them. The

harder they try to be threatening, the more we laugh at their

absurdity. When Vitti explains that Lou “the Wrench” got his name

when he twisted someone’s head off of his body, we laugh. Vitti’s pal

Jelly (scene stealer Joe Viterelli) is always hilarious because he’s

got a look that’s naturally threatening.

Saying De Niro is brilliant is like saying the water here is cold

in January -- it’s not news. De Niro makes Vitti’s crude, selfish,

offensive behavior feel endearing.

For example, when Sobel has concerns about the appropriateness of

Vitti’s excessively loud female bedroom companion, he reminds Vitti

that his 17-year-old son can hear everything. Vitti understands

Sobel’s concern and offers to ask the prostitute if she’ll take care

of Sobel’s son when he’s done with her. What a guy.

Crystal is terrific as Sobel. Crystal’s style lends itself to

broad-based comedy, like doing the Three Stooges during an exam to

see whether or not Vitti is really catatonic. When Sobel is in real

danger, Crystal seems more like a stand-up comic than a guy who’s

about to get killed. He turns the vicious people around him into

ignorant straight men setting themselves up for laughs.

The counterpoint between De Niro’s absurd toughness and Crystal’s

gift for shtick make “Analyze That” a keeper.

They are backed up by a strong cast who add a lot of laughs

without getting in the way of the main players. Lisa Kudrow is great

as Billy Crystal’s wife and should have been given more to do in the

story. Kyle Sabihy plays Michael Sobel, Crystal’s son, and makes a

small role into something memorable.

The plot is paper thin, but has enough teeth to hold up for an

hour and a half.

* JIM ERWIN, 40, is a technical writer and computer trainer.