I’m mad about (insert issue here)

I’ve been pretending to be interested in the debate between Kona

Lanes and Kohl’s. Since this type of debate comes up often, I offer

to the editors of the Daily Pilot a form letter that can, when hint

of this type of debate is seen on the horizon, be included in the

Editorial page.

Dear Daily Pilot,

I have lived in Costa Mesa since:

a) 1940

b) Last week.

c) Rome ruled the earth.

I am (was) concerned about proposed construction of:

a) Home Depot.

b) Target Greatland.

c) Kohl’s department store.

I adamantly protest change in my neighborhood because:

a) We’re becoming another Irvine.

b) I like dilapidated properties near my home and am hopeful the

crime rate will soon rise.

c) In a weak economy, the city doesn’t really need new jobs.

I know this property was commercial when I bought my home and

moved here anyway because:

a) An empty shopping center is a quiet shopping center.

b) The price was right.

c) I thought I could supplement my income by persuading the

property owner to hire me as a consultant to tell them how to make

money.

I may change my mind if the owners of the property:

a) Build a park in the now empty lot between my brand new house

and the construction.

b) Build a 20-foot wall between me and the property (and give me

air conditioning).

c) Buy me a lifetime supply of Prozac.

Sincerely,

Joe (or Jane) Citizen

It comes down to freedom of choice, folks. The community chose to

not financially support the theaters, the ice rink and Kona Lanes.

Now the owner chooses to upgrade the property, and everyone wants to

tell them how it should be done.

Residents affected by the upgrades to their neighborhood should

take a deep, appreciative breath and be thankful the owners care

enough to keep the property from becoming a blighted eyesore.

MEG TWEEDY

Costa Mesa