A day to honor a special woman

STEVE SMITH

Dads know that everything is going to be OK. That’s just the way

they’re wired. When 2-year-old little Johnny falls down, scrapes his

knee and cries because he thinks he’s going to die, Dad tells him to

tape an aspirin to it.

“You’ll live,” Dad says.

But Mom freaks. Mom is there to tell him that everything is going

to be OK and backs it up with a hug and kisses. That’s the way moms

are wired.

Neither way is wrong. When that knee-scraping scenario plays

itself later on in life in other forms, moms and dads will react the

same way. It’s a sort check and balance system that has been the

basis of successful parenting for as long as there have been

families.

But tomorrow is the day we honor the nurturing side of the

parental equation. It’s the day we set aside to honor the women in

America who too often have to play both roles in a family, thanks to

a high divorce rate.

Tomorrow we honor the moms who put a load of laundry in the

washing machine at night before they go to bed and then get up early

to make sure it’s transferred to the dryer.

Tomorrow we honor the moms who really do mean it when they say

they’re going to make sure they’ll be at the school play or the

soccer game. Make no mistake about it they are there, and no job, bad

weather or traffic is going to keep them away.

We honor the moms who relive their elementary and middle school

years by helping out on one class project after another and try to

guide Johnny -- now 12 -- through the “side, angle, side” rationale

of geometry, all the while wondering what to say to him when he asks,

“Mom, why do I have to learn this stuff?”

We honor moms because they never get sick. Dads get sick. Dads get

a cold and beg someone to put them out of their misery. Moms treat

the flu like a hangnail. They’re ones who take dads’ advice and tape

an aspirin to the pain. No illness ever stopped any mom from making

lunches for school.

We honor moms because they’re on call 24/7 and never complain

about it. When Johnny is sick, mom is the one who takes time off

work. Mom is the one who goes to take him out of school. Mom is the

one who reads him to sleep and Mom is the one who stays with him if

he can’t sleep at all.

We honor moms because I have not yet met a male of the species who

would have the courage and patience to carry a child in his belly for

nine months. That, to me, is worth this day.

We honor moms because they are the rocks in the family. From the

moment a child is born until he leaves the nest, and even beyond

that, Mom means “home” and all the good feelings that conjures up.

Mom will always be there, even if Johnny has his own set of problems.

Doesn’t matter. Mom doesn’t judge, she just makes it better.

We honor moms because they’re stronger than dads. Not physically,

perhaps, but in all the ways that we really need to set examples for

our children.

We honor moms because they sacrifice for their children. They

frequently give up careers -- or put them on hold -- because they’ve

determined that raising a child or children is more important. And

I’m happy to report that that trend is on the rise. Maybe it’s a

ripple effect from 9/11, maybe not, but it’s one the rise and that’s

a good thing for kids.

We honor moms because they’re selfless, tireless dedication to

their families is something to behold.

So, dads and kids, here’s what to do for Mom tomorrow. Save the

money you were going to spend on the jewelry, clothes or other

material item -- Mom can buy that herself.

Tomorrow, buy Mom some flowers. Make breakfast for her or take her

to brunch and make sure it includes champagne.

Then write her a note telling her that you love her; telling her

that although you don’t tell her as much as you should, you do love

her.

And whatever you do, don’t ask her if she washed that favorite

shirt of yours.

Happy Mother’s Day.

* STEVE SMITH is a Costa Mesa resident and a freelance writer.

Readers may leave a message for him on the Daily Pilot hotline at

(949) 642-6086.