No shame in being fairylike

JUNE CASAGRANDE

I was a proofreader and copy editor for Business Wire when a temp

worker -- a typist -- put me in my place. Keying in a press release,

she had taken the liberty of making a correction, adding a comma

before the word “and” in a list. I don’t remember the words, but

basically, she changed “peas, carrots and potatoes” to “peas,

carrots, and potatoes.”

Gently, like a wise and worldly person speaking to someone far

less knowledgeable, I explained that you don’t need the last comma.

The “and” does the job, I graciously explained.

Her response was quick and confident, but I don’t remember it

verbatim so I’ll paraphrase: “No, that’s a serial comma, and in a

series, all the elements need to be weighted equally.”

I learned two things that day. The first was that there was a hole

in my understanding of how to use commas. The second was to never

underestimate temps.

I double-checked my Associated Press style guide, confirmed that I

had been “right” and didn’t think much of it until years later when I

got my hands on my first copy of Strunk and White’s “The Elements of

Style.” In this little bible of English-language basics, this use of

commas in series is the second subject addressed. It’s right there on

Page 2. Strunk and White say to use the last comma. It’s “red, white,

and blue,” they say, and “gold, silver, or copper.”

Of course, this completely contradicts Associated Press style,

which has long ruled, “Do not put the comma before the conjunction in

a simple series.” Perhaps not coincidentally, they use the same

example, noting that the flag is “red, white and blue.”

When it comes to lists, you have a choice. You can either go with

the style used in books and academic writing, or you can use the more

concise newspaper style, as I will continue to do.

This is why I love learning about things like grammar and

punctuation. The goal is not to be right all the time. For me at

least, the goal is to not feel like an idiot for not having all the

answers. I’ve spent so much time feeling like there was something I

should have known but didn’t, cowering in shame, overwhelmed by what

seemed like an endless sea of stuff to know.

It seems like just about everybody feels the same about language

and grammar. That “Oh! I should have known that! How embarrassing!”

feeling.

I think that feeling is Grammar Public Enemy No. 1. Everyone’s so intimidated by the subject, it seems not even worth trying to learn.

That’s not to mention the lack of resources for learning, but that’s

the subject of a future column.

So, now that we’ve established that there should be no shame here,

let’s have some fun shaming others, shall we? (Trust me. It’ll be

good for the soul.)

A recent Los Angeles Times photo showed an actor dressed up in

rather flamboyant period costume, very effeminate. The photo caption

described the character as “fey.” This is one of my boyfriend Ted’s

pet peeves: People using the word “fey” because they think it means,

well, gay. The word’s arcane enough, however, that a writer can use

it to imply gayness without having to take responsibility for using a

slur.

The joke’s on them. Fey, according to my old but hopefully still

accurate dictionary, means “fated to die soon” or “full of the sense

of approaching death” or “having visionary power” or “appearing as if

under a spell.” Other dictionaries contain an additional definition

of “fairylike.” But because the actor’s costume included neither

wings nor pixie dust, one’s again left to wonder whether it was an

attempt at a slur.

On the other hand, it’s quite possible the character pictured in

the photo was in fact full of the sense of approaching death. I

wouldn’t know. I never actually read the article. But for now, let’s

assume the shame’s on them.

* JUNE CASAGRANDE is a freelance writer. She can be reached at

JuneTCN@aol.com.