Finding balance when others can’t

MAXINE COHEN

Surprise. Surprise. A column I wrote last Friday, “Yoga with a big

Y,” stirred up a lot of controversy. I had no idea readers would be

so responsive. I received e-mails pro, con and just plain commentary.

I think it’s valuable to voice all views, whether I agree, so I want

to share them with you.

First off though, I should recap what I said last week in case you

missed my column. I wrote about going to the new Yoga Works in

Newport Beach and attending a level 2 class where three-quarters of

the people didn’t know ujjayi breathing, the correct body position

for the different poses, and because of this, they were at risk of

injuring themselves. I find it distracting and disruptive to practice

this way, and my drishti, or gaze, is not yet developed to the point,

unfortunately (I’m working on it), where I can block out the heavy

breathing and the flopping around that passes for asana. Now that

yoga has become the hot new fitness fad, people seem to have the

misconception that if they’re strong from working out in the gym then

they’re ready for a more advanced yoga class. Not so.

I talked about attending a workshop given by Judith Lasater who

practices yoga with a big Y, which incorporates the philosophy of the

discipline, rather than yoga with a little Y, which is solely a

physical workout. Specifically, being at ease with your dis-ease

(still learning in that department), understanding that unasked-for

advice is criticism, knowing that good judgment comes from experience

and experience comes from bad judgment, recognizing that anger is a

strategy for getting primary needs met and much more.

So, in regard to the e-mails I received from readers:

J.G. wrote: “I was very nervous about showing up at ‘Power Hour’

for my first yoga class in four years, but if I’m going to do yoga at

all, I have to attend the class available when I am. I was very

grateful to Cathy Cox for making me feel comfortable ... and to the

other students who allowed me to ‘follow’ them. Cathy urged me to ‘go

at my own pace’ and do what I could do. As a result, I am very

motivated to keep going as often as I can and to include the lower

level classes which match my schedule, so I can continue to improve.

I’m glad you printed Judith Lasater’s big-Y philosophy, which shows

you really are interested in learning the true spirit of yoga and not

just the poses. I appreciate the proximity [of the Newport studio]

and the gracious spirit I found at Yoga Works. Thank you.”

And thank you J.G. for taking the time to send me your thoughtful

comments. Yes, this is ostensibly, but not really, what I was

referring to in my column when I was critical of people who attend a

higher level yoga class than their knowledge of the poses and core

strength indicate is appropriate for them. At first glance, J.G. did

just this but with a crucial difference that makes all the

difference. She was aware that she had chosen to be in over her head

for valid reasons and was watching and taking good care of herself

based on her prior knowledge of the asanas, and she was thus, at

least in my book, respectful of the other students and the

discipline, not to mention herself.

C.L.A. sent an e-mail, the subject of which she described as

“unasked for advice.” Uh oh! I could tell right off I was going to

get blasted. And right I was.

C.L.A. thought my column was “incredibly shallow.” She suggested

that if I was “not already familiar with the concept of beginners

mind, I recommend it to you as a possible path to your liberation.

The gems from Judith L., however, I have cut out and will keep in my

yoga scrapbook.” She ended with “Peace.”

All this made me stop and think. Maybe I got it wrong. Maybe I was

being too harsh. Weirder things have happened. I decided to do what I

do best when I’m unsure and want to know. I gather information. So I

asked around.

I corralled a teacher as she was finishing her class. She said

that people who are total beginners don’t belong in a higher level

class. They might injure themselves assuming the poses incorrectly or

might lose control of their bodies and fall, hurting themselves and

knocking someone else over, injuring them. She said that she can help

people who are aware of the breathing and postures but who aren’t

quite strong enough for the level of the class to modify the poses

and still be safe. So that’s not a problem, but she wishes the front

desk would take responsibility for assessing people’s proficiency and

stop them from going to classes they are not ready for.

Another teacher said that he encourages people who come to classes

that are way above their heads to use the class as a chance to

observe and learn rather than as a workout. If a lower level class is

going on at the same time, he’ll steer them to that. Years ago, this

used to really aggravate him, and he used to ask them to leave, but

now he sees it as an opportunity for him to work on developing

compassion. He said he’d like it if the front desk would take a more

active role in helping students go to the classes that fit their

ability level.

And serendipitously, I bumped into the teacher of the now infamous

level 2 class that I wrote about. I asked what her experience

instructing it was like. She said the range of ability was so diverse

that she didn’t know what ability level to gear it to. This was an

ongoing concern for her, and it was so hard to deal with that she’d

opted out some time ago and now teaches only lower level classes,

where she assumes that people know very little, and so she teaches

the basics. She suggested, and I like this idea very much, that Yoga

Works institute a new class designation, “by invitation only,” so

that the teacher would have to OK it for you to participate in the

class.

OK. So it sounds like I’m not being all that harsh after all. The

consensus seems to support me. However, and I think this is the

crucial point, an attitude of compassion would go a long way. I

should try to cultivate a more compassionate attitude toward others

on the mat and off the mat. And I am trying. My yoga practice is

about just that. It’s about learning -- that’s why it’s called

practice. If it were about mastery, it’d be called something else.

B.H. wrote to comment on the feeling of anger. She thanked me for

reminding her that “anger is another face of fear [and that in]

‘Conversations with God,’ Walsh posits that there are only two

emotions -- love and fear.”

I’ll go along with that.

I love yoga and I fear that we will lose sight of the teachings

and the discipline and become so immersed in our Western myopia that

yoga will be, and already is I fear, reduced to a teeny tiny “y” and

the next big fitness craze.

* MAXINE COHEN is a Corona del Mar resident and a marriage and

family therapist practicing in Newport Beach, whose columns will

appear regularly. She can be reached at maxinecohen@adelphia.net or

(949) 644-6435.