Last one picked is a good egg

PETER BUFFA

Does no one listen to you? Does anybody care what you say? Ever feel

like you’re not even there?

It’s not your fault. You could be “irrelevant.”

Andre Sommersell is, and he couldn’t be happier about it.

Sommersell, an overachieving 23-year-old defensive end from

Colorado State, is Mr. Irrelevant XXIX, which means 29. You’d know

that if you were an ancient Roman, which you aren’t, because there

are none left.

Tomorrow marks the official start of Irrelevant Week XXIX (29,

ancient Roman, none left). Perhaps Irrelevant Week does not ring a

bell with you, although I don’t see how that is possible.

It all started 29 years ago with Newport Beach luminary, bon

vivant and cement contractor Paul Salata. Salata was a football

standout at USC in the late ... well, a while ago, then went on to

play pro football first in Canada (where they have yet to explain

what that extra 10 yards is about) and then the NFL with the San

Francisco 49ers.

Salata’s career with the 49ers was brief but spectacular. To this

day, ask any San Francisco fan to name the three best 49ers ever and

they will tell you, Joe Montana, Ronnie Lott, and Jerry Rice.

Anyway, while working the phones for the 49ers at the 1976 NFL

draft, Paul was struck by two things: the big to-do over the

first-round draft pick and the deafening silence over the last pick.

“They always made a big deal about the first guy picked,” Salata

said. “So I thought, gee, what about the last guy? I decided to bring

him to Newport Beach and have a big celebration, just as if he was

the first guy picked.” Boy, did he ever.

Within a few years, Mr. Irrelevant and his special week became so

popular that teams were maneuvering and passing on closing round

picks in the hope of claiming Mr. Irrelevant.

In 1979, the NFL actually passed the “Salata Rule” to force teams

to make their pick and restore some order to the closing round.

Every year, when the time comes to announce the NFL’s last man of

the last hour, it is none other than Paul Salata who takes the

microphone to break the news to the national press.

This year he introduced Andre Sommersell, the 255th NFL draft

pick, chosen by the Oakland Raiders, to the world.

Irrelevant Week XXIX officially kicks off tomorrow at 5:30 p.m. at

Newport Dunes, where a jazz band, painfully perky cheerleaders and

some of those always-stylish “”Raider Nation” fans will gather to

give Andre and his family a royal welcome.

Anyone and everyone is invited for the embarrassingly modest price

of $10, which includes sustenance.

And so begins a dizzying, week-long round of gifts, libations,

celebrations and media notations for the Sommersell family, including

a VIP tour of the Magic Kingdom, which will be covered by the

national press, and traditionally includes a brief catch between Mr.

Irrelevant, Mickey and Minnie -- the latter two being famous mice.

On Wednesday night, Andre will be roasted, toasted, feted and

vetted at a celebrity banquet at the Newport Beach Marriott, although

-- with one of the roasters being a former mayor of Costa Mesa and

Daily Pilot columnist -- “celebrity” is a relative term.

At the banquet, Andre will receive the highly coveted, sort of,

Lowsman Trophy, a bronze sculpture of a shocked receiver fumbling

away the ball -- the polar opposite of The Heisman Trophy.

Of course, nothing is more tongue-in-cheek about being named Mr.

Irrelevant than the title itself, considering thousands of the very

best college players across the country would give up at least one

body part to be picked in the NFL draft -- first, last or middle.

According to Melanie Fitch, who is the boss-lady of Irrelevant

Week and just happens to be Paul Salata’s daughter, “It’s a

tremendous honor to get drafted at all.”

But is this totally irrelevant week nothing but fun and games and

frivolity? It is not, I tell you.

Let’s get serious for a

moment ...

OK, that’s enough.

The proceeds of Irrelevant Week benefit a number of outstanding

community organizations, including Costa Mesa United -- which is

working hard to raise the rubles and guide the effort to build two

major athletic facilities for Costa Mesa’s high schools: a

state-of-the-art, 50-meter swimming and water polo facility at Costa

Mesa High School, and a top-tier sports stadium and track at Estancia

High.

How ironic is that? Most ironic, I tell you, because Andre

Sommersell went to Estancia High School, for two years anyway, which

is more than enough for a local-boy-makes-good story.

In fact, Andre is the first Orange County product to be named a

Mr. Irrelevant/Lowsman Trophy winner. It’s a funny old world, isn’t

it? (“Yes” is the correct answer.)

“I had heard about Mr. Irrelevant before, but I didn’t know what

it was all about,” Sommersell said. “This is exciting -- especially

coming back to Orange County.”

Well, Andre, we are just as excited as you are, although we’d be

even more excited if we were 23 and about to sign with an NFL team.

On the other hand, we don’t have to deal with Al Davis and the

Raider Nation.

I suspect Andre and his family will remember Irrelevant Week for a

good long time, but he’ll have to switch gears and refocus fast.

On Saturday, Sommersell heads for the annual NFL Rookie

Orientation Camp, which happens to be at the La Quinta resort.

Wow.

A week in Newport, then straight to La Quinta without a moment’s

rest. It’s ugly, but somebody has to do it.

I gotta go.

* PETER BUFFA is a former Costa Mesa mayor. His column runs

Sundays. He may be reached by e-mail at ptrb4@aol.com.