Friendship shape

Barbara Diamond

Juggling menus to suit everyone in a family can be tough. Imagine

cooking for 29 strangers.

“You keep it simple,” said Julie Gemmell of Laguna Beach. “You

nourish them and you fill them.”

Groups and individuals have volunteered to prepare dinners almost

since Friendship Shelter was founded in 1988 to help homeless adults

regain their self-esteem and self-sufficiency. Guest chefs are

welcomed. Professional experience is not required.

“We literally just looked in the cupboard and went from there,”

said Gemmell, a guest chef with her daughter, Ella, 13.

The Gemmells cooked hamburgers and made a salad, and then Julie

Gemmell dashed out to buy a dessert.

“I went because Ella was going, and I thought I should share the

experience with her,” the teenager’s mother said. “She got to see a

whole new side of life, to see that people can get down on their luck

-- that they are not homeless by choice. It could happen to anyone.

“Just to be part of that is a humbling experience.”

Ella is a member of the Peer Assistance Leaders, a group organized

at Thurston Middle School by counselor Kay Ostensen. Part of

Ostensen’s program is to encourage community service.

“She has been doing the dinners forever,” said son Derek Ostensen,

a Sawdust Festival exhibitor. “I remember helping years ago. She

could probably go down to Thalia Street [beach] right now and snag a

bunch of kids to go.”

Kay Ostensen has been taking peer assistance members to cook and

serve dinners at the shelter for six years. She was startled to

realize more than 150 students had participated under the

peer-assistance aegis.

“I take three a month -- that’s 30 a year, but some are

repeaters,” Kay Ostensen said. “Residents always ask the kids why

they volunteer and they are so appreciative, no matter what we

serve.”

The youthful chefs tour the building and get a glimpse of what it

is like to do without the things they take for granted.

Forget cellphones. How about being grateful for a telephone

number?

“I show them a phone and explain that people have to have an

address and telephone to get a job,” Kay Ostensen said.

How about a roof over their heads and three meals a day?

“The next morning before classes start, we review the experience

and what they learned,” Kay Ostensen said. “We always receive so much

more than we give.”

Laguna Beach Heritage Committee member Tamara Campbell, a senior

planner for the city when Friendship Shelter was founded almost 15

years ago, vividly recalls her experiences there, both professional

and as a volunteer.

“I applied for a lot of grants for them,” said Campbell, who now

works for Newport Beach. “Every year I would go to the county and

plead my case. I ended up getting between $600,000 and $1 million.

Campbell also volunteered as a guest chef.

“I think we turned out some pretty tasty meals,” Campbell said. “I

tried to go early and figure out what was needed. Then I would run to

the store and do some shopping. After all, you can’t can serve

spaghetti and meatballs without parmesan cheese.”

After cooking, Campbell joined the shelter residents for dinner.

“I would eat with them and see the progress they were making in

their lives,” Campbell said. “It was a very rewarding experience.

Some guest chefs prefer to cook at home and take it to the

shelter. Others partially cook at home and finish up at the shelter

or prepare all the food in the shelter kitchen or on the propane

barbecue.

Shelter Supervisor Brian McWeeney coordinates volunteer programs,

including guest chefs.

“When someone calls to volunteer, I explain the opportunities,”

McWeeney said. “Chefs have a high priority.”

If the volunteer decides to be a guest chef, McWeeney pulls out

his calendar, and they decide on a date.

Guest chefs don’t sign a contract

“They can sign up for once a month, once every two months or just

for one time,” McWeeney said. “Often volunteers sign up for one time

but come back.”

Most dates are open.

However, Saddleback Church High School Ministry has been sending

guest chefs on the first Saturday of the month for about five years,

according to John Cappone, who has coordinated the program for the

past two years.

“It is all student funded,” Cappone said. “The students buy the

food, prepare it and then sit down and eat dinner with the folks

there.

“Last week -- we skipped the first Saturday because of the holiday

-- I saw a student sit down and talk with a subdued woman off by

herself. It’s cool to see students get outside themselves, and the

[shelter] residents seem to enjoy it. It’s neat to watch them

interact.”

Sometimes as many as eight or nine youngsters volunteer, but the

facility, Cappone said, is small and can get crowded. Four to six

chefs works better. They range in age from 15 to 18.

Laguna Presbyterian Church regularly prepares food for the shelter

on the third Tuesday of the month. Other groups that have

participated include the Laguna Beach chapter of the National Charity

League, a mother/daughter organization that requires community

service.

“We also have several Laguna Beach High School groups that earn

the community service hours they need to graduate,” McWeeney said.

“Sometimes people just call out of the blue.”

Chefs who also supply food as well as cook it cut the shelter’s

costs dramatically, according to Janet Larkley, shelter executive

director. The shelter provides three meals a day for its residents, a

maximum of 29.

“Ideally, we would have guest chefs 365 nights a year,” Larkley

said. “The other big bonus is that the guest chefs become shelter

supporters when they see for themselves who the homeless are and how

the shelter helps them get back on their feet.”

Residents prepare breakfast, lunch and dinners, when no guest chef

has volunteered, as part of their daily housekeeping chores.

Shelter volunteer Joe Peterson makes a weekly shopping trip to

Costco and Smart and Final, buying food and household supplies at the

cheapest prices he can find. He shops from a printed list with needed

items checked.

“The hardest part is figuring out how to buy food to be cooked by

people who don’t know how to cook,” Peterson said. “Through

experience, I have an idea of how much is needed.”

His list always includes fresh fruit and salad ingredients. He

said he stopped buying fresh vegetables when he learned frozen

vegetables are just as healthy. They are easier to cook and store

longer if the current residents opt for another variety that the next

group might relish.

He scrutinizes contents to make sure ingredients do not include

alcohol.

Peterson buys hot and cold cereals, eggs and 10 gallons of milk a

week, as well as dry milk. French toast and pancakes are served

frequently for breakfast, bacon and sausage not so often.

He said the shelter can’t afford butter. He buys margarine.

“Pizza is always a favorite,” he said. “And we try to accommodate

vegetarians.”

But forget desserts -- too expensive and often donated.

“South Coast Medical Center donates a lot of food, a little less

now under the new ownership,” Peterson said. “I used to think they

cooked extra just for us.”

The weekly shopping gets packed into Peterson’s Honda Accord. He

has a helper for loading and unloading.

“The biggest thing every week is laundry soap -- I think it is 50

pounds,” Peterson said.

Peterson has been shopping for the center for more than six of the

10 years he has volunteered there. He also has helped residents write

resumes for job applications and budgets for when they leave the

shelter.

Friendship Shelter serves more than 250 homeless adults every

year. They range in age from 18 to 80. Programs and services include

life-skills workshops, treatment for substance abuse and mental

illness, job readiness counseling, family reunification and

transitional housing.

Transitional housing is provided at Henderson House in San

Clemente. The facility was named for the Rev. Colin Henderson, a

founder of Friendship Shelter and its first executive director.

The shelter grew out of the “Care Program” begun in 1985 by a

group of Laguna Beach residents at St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, where

Henderson served as assistant priest from 1985 to 1987.

“The shelter became my full-time job,” Henderson said.

Larkley took over from Henderson as executive director of the

shelter 7 1/2 years ago.

Programs take up 77% of the $500,000 annual budget to operate

Friendship Shelter and Henderson House. Another 19% funds general and

administrative costs, and the last 4% pays for fundraising.

Revenue comes from fundraising and special events, 29% of the

total; government grants, 24%; transitional housing rents, 14%;

donated materials and contributions, 12% each; corporation and

foundation grants, 8%; and interest income, 1%.

For more information about the guest chef program, other volunteer

opportunities or information about the shelter, call McWeeney at

(949) 494-6928, Ext. 15.

* BARBARA DIAMOND is a reporter for the Laguna Beach Coastline

Pilot. She may be reached at (949) 494-4321.